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**OnlineHost** You have entered the Yankees Stadium Circa 1938 Chatroom. |
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Son: There he is, Pops! There he is! Comin' outta the stadium!
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Father: Well? You gonna stand there or are you gonna go say hi?
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Son: I don't know. I don't really wanna.
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Father: Don't gimme that bullpucky. Just go over there, say hi. Tell him he played a great game.
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Son: Um! Um, hi Mr. DiMaggio!
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Joltin_Joe: /shakes hand
Hey, kiddo! Have fun at the game today?
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Son: y-yes mr. dimaggio
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Joltin_Joe: /signs baseball
Here ya go, kid. Thanks for comin' out to see us today. Lemme tell ya somethin', we might not win every game, but we sure will give ya yer money's worth. Stay outta trouble, yeah?
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**OnlineHost** Joltin_Joe has left the chatroom.
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Father: He's right, ya know. The Yanks are a helluva team. You give to them, they'll give back to you. Remember that, buddy.
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Son: Thanks, Dad.
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**OnlineHost** You have entered the Bronx, New York, circa 1959 chatroom. |
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Wife: Honey...what are we gonna do?
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Husband: /sigh
I dunno, babe.
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Wife: Well you gotta do somethin'! Ya father's been in the ground five years, and we're still payin' his hospital bills! Even if I keep workin' doubles at the diner, we won't have enough.
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Husband: C'maan, don't talk about my pops. I don't wanna talk right now.
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Wife: You're the head of this household! What are the kids gonna do? Ya gotta make somethin' happen!
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Husband: /takes coat off hook
I'm goin' out. Don't wait up.
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Wife: Oh, what? To another Yankees game? Why? Ya always go by yaself, ya stumble home drunk as a buzzard, and we never get to see ya! Grow up for once!
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Husband: I swear to God, don't talk to me like that. Just let me be.
/puts on coat
/slams door
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**OnlineHost** Husband has left the chatroom.
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Wife: /buries head in hands
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**OnlineHost** You have entered the Bronx, New York, circa 2001 chatroom. |
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Wife: /munches on spoonful of dog food
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Husband: /stares at wife
/drops spoon in bowl, begins to weep
Baby, I'm so sorry.
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Wife: Don't start cryin'! There's no use in cryin' about it! All sortsa folks get tough breaks, and we're one of 'em!
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Husband: /sniff
I shouldn'ta been outta the house so much. Shouldn't a gone to the Stadium every night. We coulda saved that money, put it in the bank, and I could take care o'ya now like I wish I could.
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Wife: There's no coulda, it's just life.
/takes husband's hand
I love ya, Marvin.
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Husband: God, Baby, I loves ya too. More than the whole world.
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**OnlineHost** You have entered the Bronx, New York Present Day chatroom. |
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Man: Yeah, I'm doin' just fine...yeah, I know...yeah, thanks for comin' all the way up here for it. Yeah, yeah, the flowers were great.
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Man: Oh, I know. She was really somethin'...I gotta go, okay?
/hangs up phone
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Man: /sighs
puts on coat
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**OnlineHost** Welcome to Yankees Stadium Chat! |
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Man: Think I musta spent about 15 large in this place over the years.
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Man: What was it my kid was sayin'? That they're payin' Roger Clemens 15 large for every pitch he throws?
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Man: Well hell, ya Yanks. I gave ya everything I got. It wasn't much, but it was what I had. Let's see what ya do with my money, Roger.
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OldLOL: /winds up
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Man: /watches eagerly
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OldLOL: /strains hamstring, ends career
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Man: /sits, motionless
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Man: ...
What a friggin' rat trap, this world.
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Earlier today, PostmanE posted this fascinating statistical breakdown of what the Yankees really paid Roger Clemens. 
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
10-09-2007 @ 11:10PM
petejayhawk said...
Third most depressing Dugout ever. Do pre-Fanhouse Dugouts count in the statistics? Do they get asterisks? How does this work?
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 1:35AM
AL SHARPTONS said...
I THINK SHAWN GREEN SHOULD RETIRE AND TAKE OVER TORRES JOB
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 2:21AM
louann ostrander said...
The yankees dugout odessey is about the stupidest thing I have read, now that takes some real talent, so the Yankees spend money for a good team, that obviously is what it takes you get waht you pay for. you people who rag about the money the Yankees spend need to shut you big mouths, and appreciate what really goes on, that is the way it is. get over yourself., stupidos. Get a life ignoramuses root for a different sport, it is all politics, like Washington, get it rummies. Only I think baseball, especiall the Yankees and ARod AREawesome, so quit yer bitchin' that is life, you gotta pay if you want talent, make sense? does to me. why don't you contribute, and make things even, instead of crabbin' crabbin'crabbin', you are disgusting. go away you draw flies.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 2:21AM
louann ostrander said...
Bois, do you call that talent? that was the sorriest piece of garbage I have ever read., go away, idjt no more please, no one wants to read crap like that, it stinks.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 2:22AM
PostmanE said...
Incrediblly well done man. Awesome.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 4:21AM
mike said...
I think this was a random, but well written Dugout. I like the twist ending with the cheapshot on Clemens, he is an asshole. This is by far not the best Dugout I have read (including pre-fanhouse) but it's not like I should expect you guys to write the best one ever... every time. 6/10.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 8:14AM
Eileenyy said...
LOUANN...... Good for you Gal.. !!
Arn't these fans sickening!! I am so tired of them and immature jealous remareks.
They wish they had our talent!!
There tune would change if they had Alex, LOL
Always picking on New York!
Fruck Them Gal...
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 10:20AM
BS BLOG WATCHER said...
I think its time we get a black man in the dugout of the yankees as the manager. JESSE JACKSON IS THE MAN TO GET IN THE HYMIETOWN DUGOUT. AS JESSE WOULD SAY HE WOULDNT LET HYMIETOWN DOWN. SO PLEASE DON'T LET ME DOWN HYMIETOWN
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 11:20AM
louann ostrander said...
Bois, do you call that talent? that was the sorriest piece of garbage I have ever read., go away, idjt no more please, no one wants to read crap like that, it stinks.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 11:30AM
SilvaSurfer said...
alls i am e'saying is, i find it incredibly ironic that fanhouse finds the need to censor the dugout and then allows this kind of idiocy to live free in the comments.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 11:44AM
Eileenyy said...
You bloggers are offensive and rude,
which is why you get blogs like ours!!
Get the heck off the blogs and grow up!
By the way, if A'rod came to your team you'd love it and you know it!! LOL
But for now, just keep on talking about him and the Yanks on every blog, and stupid....Did they really end up 21 and 29?? What have you been watching, the Simpsons??
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 1:01PM
Scott Carefoot said...
I love these Yankees fans who think people are jealous of their overpaid, underachieving team. The Yanks are like a trophy wife that spends all your money but never puts out because she has a perpetual headache.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 1:01PM
snakeyez49 said...
Hilarious comments! Why anyone would be jealous of a team that starts 21-29 and then gets dumped in the first round is beyond me. Typical New Yorkers, thinking they are better than everyone else....LOL
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 1:01PM
Linda Serenko said...
After going onto all the websites on Tuesday morning, how incredibly frustrating to see EVERYTHING about the Yankees and NOTHING about Cleveland. Who won this game? Who played the better games? Who worked their hearts out to win this series? Yet one single word on the page of the website about CLEVELAND INDIANS. I am sure that I am speaking for thousands of Indians fans all across the country who feel the same...But like always, its always about the YANKEES...please give me a break and acknowledge the young men who worked their tails off all season to BEAT THEM.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 1:02PM
Doug H. said...
Bitter Yankees fans and a drive-by Klanner. Welcome to Fanhouse, guys.
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 1:09PM
whittnasty said...
JON BOIS U R AN IDIOT!~@$@#$@!#
Just kidding, my friend. Half of these people don't get the point of this Dugout, so I'll just quote what you wrote at the top:
"Today's Dugout, after the jump, happens to be about a Yankees fan, but it could probably apply to a fan of just about any other team out there."
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 1:26PM
Eileenyy said...
Can't any of you jealous Bloggers of a Dynsasty
stop repeating yourselves??
LOL, wow, you all copy one another!!
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 4:56PM
Tizoc said...
You're absolutely right, Eileenyy. The Yankees, although eliminated, are still a force to be reckoned with in the playoffs and should still be favored by the media.
Yankees in 2
Reply
10-10-2007 @ 8:53PM
Sean O said...
I love the Dugout, and yet the comments are becoming as entertaining as the chats. Nobody even comes close to understanding, but seems to randomly pick one word and freak the hell out.
U SED CLIEMENS, U SUCK.
Reply
10-11-2007 @ 2:31AM
Brandon said...
I don't think alot of these people understand the dugout humor.
Reply