FanHouse Blogs

Comedy Central and The Onion have long dominated their respective venues in terms of satirizing the tar out of the general news. There has been, however, a distinctively awkward void in the world of sports -- Versus attempted to fill this with their production of "Sports Soup" but when the best moment of that show includes Brandon Marshall hosting, well, it's pretty much doomed.

But it seems as if the humorous basic cable take on sports that we have all pined longingly for is about to emerge: CC and The Onion are joining forces to create a show. And, yeah, if you didn't just scream, "HOLY YES!" then you're a total, well, um, something.

Is it all the rage to make silly comments in the announcing booth these days? Because, between Bob Griese's taco pop and what Gus Johnson dropped on Sunday, well, it sure seems like announcers are becoming less aware of what they say these days.

Oh, you didn't hear what Gus dropped as Tennessee's Chris Johnson was ripping off a long touchdown run? How about: "First down and 10. Johnson ... gets his shoulders square! Watch out! He's got gettin' away from the cops speed! Touchdown!" Emphasis there was mine (as much as it can be with Mr. Johnson, anyway) and sure, he's got a pretty good reason to think that CJ might be running from the cops -- after all, the Titans running back did attend ECU (I kid, I kid). But my pro-Wolfpack biases aside, if Gus happens to be -- as Brian Powell pointed out -- say, Jim Nantz, this probably doesn't go over quite as well.

Vid after the jump, natch.

Bill Simmons is becoming like Brett Favre in the sense that ESPN is shoving him down our throats.

(Except in Simmons' case, it's for his new book, not for his annual coming-out-of-retirement announcement. Unlike Simmons, however, Favre doesn't block random bloggers from following his Twitter account. Moving on...)

And last night he landed on the Colbert Report to talk about his new 700-page basketball book with the world's favorite "fundit."

What resulted was a pretty fantastic interview, particularly when you consider that Simmons managed to stop Colbert in his Air-Bud-mentioning tracks with an "I've got two pages comparing Teen Wolf to Kobe Bryant" line. You could even tell that Colbert was asking if that was real as they cut away, and he somehow managed to let the interview run long, which almost never happens.

ESPN.com's Bill Simmons is currently on his book tour (more on that here), but on Monday, he and his Beverly Hills mansion were featured on "Mayne Street."

Kenny Mayne has made a career out of his deadpanned quirkiness. That, along with the fact that Simmons doesn't have much of an acting resume, figured to make for an uncomfortable four or five minutes that included me wincing as Simmons stumbled through his lines while Mayne got all the laughs.

Didn't happen. In fact, Simmons stole the episode. Jenn with two n's, the Doug Christie Clippers jersey, Stacy Keibler calling Mayne "Lenny", business associate Scott -- all hilarious. Well, to everybody but Mike Francesa, who was railing about Simmons' performance on his radio show.

(UPDATE: "Mayne Street" segment, Francesa's comments,and Simmons' response all after the jump.)

Sean Salisbury might not be particularly adept at banging out e-mails on an iPhone, but through the misspelled missives and unhinged diatribes he kept his word. This week Salisbury filed a lawsuit against Deadspin for causing him to lose his ESPN job, and later a Dallas radio gig, and damaging his reputation in the process.

Salisbury left ESPN in February 2008, and he was fired from 105.3 The Fan last month.

A few weeks later, Deadspin posted a lengthy e-mail exchange with Salisbury, who vowed legal action: "I just want u to know ur guys lies and carelessness about CBS and espn stories has not only ruined my reputation but has cost me jobs so prepare urself for a lawsuit so big I will own deadpan ..."

And that's exactly what happened. Via the McKinney Courier-Gazette:

Kate Lacey (or Katie Lacey, according to the post), a Senior VP at ESPN, was one of the names that Deadspin dropped earlier this week when they examined, using reader-submitted rumors, the "sexual depravity" within Bristol. ESPN responded yesterday with a statement calling that examination both "despicable" and "rumor mongering."

Turns out, AJ Daulerio's editorial commentary in this instance was actually spot on: the New York Post confirmed Friday morning in a story titled "2 ESPN Execs Playing Around" that Lacey is indeed in a relationship with co-worker David Berson.

We've already established this week that the football fans in Canada are more determined in their efforts to grab attention than their counterparts in the States. On Thursday, we learned that the players are a notch or two above their American counterparts on the crazy meter, as well. Take, for example, the case of Edmonton Eskimos defensive tackle Xzavie Jackson who was involved in a skirmish on the practice field with teammate Aaron Fiacconi.

Now, fights on the practice field and feuds in the locker room are nothing new in sports, especially on the gridiron. Stuff happens. Tempers flare. Emotions get the best of people.

And you thought American sports fans were a little off their rocker. Here, we simply fight in the stands and run across the field allowing security guards to tackle us in the outfield. Our friendly neighbors to the north? Well, they raise the stakes to daredevil levels and climb the goalposts.

During the Hamilton Tiger-cats vs. Calgary Stampeders game on September 18, which the Tiger-cats won 24-17, a fan decided to scale the goalpost, climb the upright, slide down like a fireman's pole, and then tightrope walk across the crossbar, all before falling into the waiting hands of stadium security.

Multiple videos after the jump.

Ric Flair is an icon among wrestling fans, not only worldwide but in North Carolina as well. He's always appearing on the Carolina Panthers jumbotron, screaming something or another about not drinking and driving (WOO!) and he's been known to show up at college football games and tailgates across the state.

And now he's been honored with his own commemorative scratch-off lottery tickets, designed specifically to help the children of North Carolina become more smarter. Or something.

Craigslist: the hottest place on the planet to sell athletes. Why? Because it's free, man. And when you think about associated costs of trafficking in real human people vs. being able to just sell someone online for nothing, well, it's a no-brainer: the latter is a better option. Also, it's pretty damn funny.

For instance, Jake Delhomme, everyone's least favorite Carolina Panthers turnover machine quarterback, was available for purchase on Craigslist as late as today (thank you, Jeebus and CLTBlog, for "print screen" though). Serious analysis of the sale ... after the jump!