FanHouse AdamArchuleta

If Titans head coach Jeff Fisher is looking for a silver lining, something to motivate his team hours after getting throttled by the Patriots 59-0, maybe this is it: Tom Brady is going to Hell.

At least according to the Amazing Grace Baptist Church, which declared that New England's quarterback is destined for eternal damnation for his sinful existence in this life. Via NESN (via the Huddle)

When talking about front-office futility, Matt Millen sets the pace. Mercifully for Lions fans, he's been relieved of his duties as the team's president and general manager, but his legacy lives on. His infatuation with using high-round draft picks on wide receivers might have been his biggest weakness, although that's certainly up for debate.

Charles Rogers and Mike Williams are on the list of first-round wide receiver busts, but a name that's often overlooked -- and one that we can't blame on Millen -- is Peter Warrick, who the Bengals selected with the fourth-overall pick in 2001.

The inaugural UFL draft took place on Thursday night, and at least a few names of the 96 called were recognizable ones.

Quick primer: The United Football League, which begins its first season of play in October, consists of four teams (Las Vegas, New York, Orlando and San Francisco). Each team has 20 players allotted to it -- we do not know the identities of those guys yet -- plus 24 draft choices. The four 60-man rosters would then be filled by players who are cut during NFL training camps, or who sign contracts in lieu of attending camps, like we hear J.P. Losman will do.

On Monday, Matt Snyder wondered if the Redskins' interest in quarterback Mark Sanchez was just shrewd maneuvering, an attempt to hide their true intentions as they plot their weekend draft strategy.

Dan Snyder (no relation to Matt, at least to hear Matt tell it) and Vinny Cerrato have a spotty record when it comes to personnel decisions, although most mistakes have come via big-money free-agent signings. (Recent, obvious examples: Brandon Lloyd, Adam Archuleta.) In recent years, the 'Skins have been low-key on draft weekend. Depending on who you believe, that may or may not change this time around.

The offseason got underway Thursday, and the Patriots wasted little time in franchising Matt Cassel. What they plan to do with him remains a mystery, but there are plenty of teams in need of quarterback help.

In fact, if you believe National Football Post's Michael Lombardi, nearly a third of NFL franchises could stand an upgrade at the position. The Lions and Vikings top the list, obviously, but Lombardi also thinks the Redskins could be in the market for a new quarterback, if not this offseason, then in a year's time.

FanHouse's Matt Snyder made an impassioned plea to get his shot with the Raiders since, well, they'll apparently sign anybody off the street. While we await word from Al Davis, Snyder might have another opportunity to show how four years of high school football translates into a wildly successful NFL career.

Vikings head coach Brad Childress, miffed that some media types have referred to his training camp as "soft", has thrown down the gauntlet.

This year, he had the Vikings in full pads four times out of the first 26 sessions, but he feels it's been anything but soft. Childress was perturbed enough to challenge any media member to take part in one of his practices, making reference to author George Plimpton spending time in Lions training camp in the 1960s and writing about it in his book "Paper Lion." No one took Childress up on the offer to sign an injury waiver and join running back Adrian Peterson in the huddle.

Unfortunately, Snyder wasn't in the room because that would be the story of the preseason. Sure, there would be detractors (like this buzz kill), but for all the talk about moms, basements, translucent complexions and minimal athletic ability, there really is no measure of a blogger's heart.

Here's to hoping Snyder eventually gets his shot at glory; partly to fulfill a week-old dream, and partly to show Childress that bloggers are much, much tough than your average beat reporter.

That's right. You read the headline correctly.

As a Bears fan that sat through Adam Archuleta's futile attempt to play football last year, I have to put my foot down. The Raiders signed him today ... as a linebacker? You have to be kidding me.

Sure, he was once a good -- at best -- player. So was Donnell Woolford. He hasn't collected paychecks in the NFL since 1997, which is about as long as it's been since I played football. Did I play in the NFL? Of course not. I am, however, just as qualified as Adam Archuleta to be compensated for attempting to play football.

Want proof? Let's go to the proverbial tale of the tape:

Size
Archuleta: 6' 223 lbs.
Snyder: 5'8" 165 lbs.
Advantage: Me, of course. I'll be really sneaky instead of stomping around like a Clydesdale out there.

Experience
Archuleta: Seven NFL seasons, age 30.
Snyder: High school ... making me quite the unique American, also age 30.
Advantage: Think about all the wear and tear he's put his body through in seven seasons of the brutal grind. I'm fresh, baby. Sitting around at home blogging keeps a body fit. A spry thirty, to say the least.

Speed
Archuleta: No way he can break five-flat in the 40.
Snyder: Despite having a surgically repaired ACL, I could without breaking a sweat.
Advantage: You know the drill by now.

It sucks to be Greg Wesley today. The Raiders released the safety just a few weeks after signing him to make room on the roster for Adam Archuleta. And, yes, that would be the same Adam Archuleta who spent two inglorious seasons with the Redskins and Bears before mercifully getting released.

Well, he's back in the league, not as a defensive back, but at his old college position: linebacker. No, really. I suppose this could be worse -- I mean, the Raiders could've signed Archuleta to play safety.

Luckily, Oakland's secondary is set -- on paper, they're one of the best units in the AFC. The linebacker position could use some depth, and, apparently that's what Archuleta adds.

The Oakland Tribune's Jerry McDonald has all the gory details:

Two years ago, the Bears signed Ricky Manning away from the Panthers to be the team's nickel back. Chicago front-loaded his contract, which, in terms of the salary cap implications, is good news should they decide to "Adam Archuleta" him in the coming months.

Manning currently finds himself on the third team, and last season, the Bears opted to go with rookie seventh-rounder Trumaine McBride when Nathan Vasher missed time with an injury.

The Chicago Sun-Times' Brad Biggs points out that head coach Lovie Smith is fond of using the depth chart as a motivational tool. Sometimes it works (Mark Bradley was allegedly the team's fifth wideout at the beginning of the '07 season), and sometimes it doesn't (see Cedric Benson ... any example will do).

Manning gives the response we've come to expect from players who could be losing their jobs:

'I try not to worry about things I can't control. What I can control is I will be out there making plays. I will be a playmaker in this league. Whether it's here or somewhere else, I can't control that. Whether it's this year or next year, I can't control that.''

You know, this wouldn't even be an issue if the NFL played it's games inside Denny's. When it comes to Moons Over My Hammy and nerds, Manning's unstoppable.

It looks like Adam Archuleta's NFL career could be nearing its end. The Redskins forked over $10 million guaranteed before the 2006 season for the former first-round pick only to see him lose his starting job in training camp before an injury put him back in the lineup. And then, last off-season, Washington traded Archuleta to the Bears, a team that had pursued him the year before.

Bears head coach Lovie Smith had coached Archuleta in St. Louis, and figured the safety would be comfortable in the Cover-2 defense he grew up with playing for the Rams. Didn't happen. And today, Archuleta is looking for work.

So what happened? No idea. But the Bears have a glut at safety and Archuleta became expendable. The team drafted LSU's Craig Steltz in the fourth round of the 2008 draft, and he joins Mike Brown, Brandon McGowan, Danieal Manning, and Kevin Payne.

Archuleta, 30, is an unrestricted free agent. And yet Rex Grossman, who has arguably been just as big a disappointment as Archuleta, is still gainfully employed. I'm pretty sure the Bears' '08 season wasn't going to hinge on Archuleta's role with the team; can't say the same thing about Grossman.

Hat tip: Pro Football Talk