FanHouse AndreCaldwell

After saying that he and Carson Palmer "were like Brokeback Mountain," it only made sense that Chad Ochocinco would move in with the Bengals quarterback this summer. That was the plan (according to Mr. Ochocinco), anyway.

Palmer's wife -- and I'd assume Palmer, too -- had other ideas. The family just had twins, and even if they hadn't, I'm not sure they would be interested in introducing crazy into their home. Via the Dayton Daily News' Chick Ludwig:

Even Carson Palmer, the unassuming Opie Taylor-looking Bengals quarterback, has his limits. After spending most of the 2008 season on the sidelines with a bum elbow, the 2003 first-overall pick is healthy and participating in voluntary workouts. Which, like previous offseasons, isn't the case with Chad Javon Ochocinco.

He's reportedly working out in Los Angeles, and I don't doubt that -- Chad always seems prepared, at least physically, for the start of the NFL season -- but that's not really the point. Cincinnati won just four times last year, and hasn't had a winning record since 2005, also the last time they advanced to the playoffs. (Coincidentally, that was the other time Palmer suffered a significant injury. Thanks Kim von Oelhoeffen!)

On Monday, the Seahawks signed T.J. Houshmandzadeh to a five-year, $40 million deal. Great news for Seattle -- Matt Hasselbeck will finally have a legit pass-catching threat (a seldom-healthy Deion Branch doesn't count) -- but the Bengals were suddenly down to Chad Ocho Cinco in the reliable wide receiver department. (Yikes.)

Apparently, the thought of starting the season with Chris Henry, Jerome Simpson and Andre Caldwell was enough to motivate historically cheap Bengals owner Mike Brown into action, presumably at the behest of head coach Marvin Lewis. Whatever the impetus, Cincy has a new-old Houshmandzadeh: Laveranues Coles. Via NFL.com's Adam Schefter, Coles signed a four-year, $28 million contract.

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Lance Moore only caught 32 passes for 302 yards and two touchdowns in 2007. In 2008, he caught 79 passes for 928 yards and 10 touchdowns. It came from out of nowhere, considering all the other receiving options in New Orleans, but that doesn't mean we can't start grasping at who could be the one who goes from relative fantasy obscurity to a great contributor in the time of one season.

Let's check it out those who will likely see an expanded role in their offense next season, in addition to growth as a playmaker. Please realize these are for deep keeper leagues. Do not even think about keeping any of these over an elite receiver.

Donnie Avery, Rams -- As I said in my top-10 picks post about Steven Jackson, the Rams can't get any worse. They'll figure some things out in the offseason and Mr. Avery is going to be an important part of the offense for any new administration due to his youth. We saw the flashes of talent this time around, and next season we'll see him grow into a real NFL receiver. Plus, it's not like his division is chock full of beastly defenses.

Chad Javon Ocho Cinco is back with the Bengals after being deactivated for Thursday night's Steelers contest because of a severe case of drowsiness. And while I'm sure Ryan Fitzpatrick will happily welcome his return, when you're staring at 1-9-1, it doesn't much matter who you trot out there for the next five weeks.

The real issue, however, is what will the organization do with Mr. Cinco after the season? Common sense might dictate running his ass out of town and getting whatever you can for him. Of course, the Bengals could've had a first-round pick (or two, depending on who you believe) from the Redskins last summer, but they weren't willing to deal. In retrospect, yeah, they probably should have.

But according to CBS' Charley Casserly, the plan -- as of right now, anyway -- is to keep Johnson in Cincy for 2009, too. It seems like an insane notion given all the trouble he's caused in recent seasons, but nobody's ever accused the Bengals of being smart.

FanHouse colleague Ryan Wilson stated that the Bengals are giving up on the season by shutting down quarterback Carson Palmer for the season. I think that is a great idea.

The Cincinnati Bengals are 0-7 and still have the Steelers, Eagles, Redskins, Ravens, Colts and Jaguars remaining on the schedule. Needless to say, this season looks like it has already been lost. Heck, fans are hoping they go 0-16 just to prove a point to owner Mike Brown.

There is no need for Palmer to try to play at any point this season. Lose the battle and win the war. Get your elbow fixed and ready to roll for the 2009 season. In sports, there is no honor in being stupid. Take the time to research the surgery, get the proper advice and information, and then do what you have to do to be ready for '09.

As for the Bengals organization, you'd be best served to use the rest of this season as a big job audition. Just like the consultants did in Office Space, have everyone re-apply for their job and weed out the weak.

Cincinnati: the NFL's halfway house. In news that should've surprised no one, the team re-signed chronic law breaker Chris Henry yesterday. At the time, the move was thought to be a combination of things: injuries to starters Chad Johnson and T.J. Houshmandzadeh, and less-than-expected progress by the two rookies, Jerome Simpson and Andre Caldwell.

And today, Bengals.com confirms as much: the team, faced with the possibility of going into the season without two of it's best players and nothing behind them, prompted the re-ushering in of the Chris Henry Era. Ah, good times, indeed.

The signing indicates that Chad Johnson's sprained shoulder is serious enough that the Bengals look to be preparing for the possibility that Johnson could be sidelined for several weeks, although Johnson insisted Monday night he'll be back for the opener.

But that's not the only injury that has clouded the receiver picture in the last 48 hours. There is also rookie receiver Andre Caldwell's sprained foot and T.J. Houshmandzadeh's hamstring. He's 50-50 at best to play in his first preseason game Saturday night against the Saints, and the Bengals could be forced to sign a receiver in addition to Henry.

But it gets better: according to Henry's agent, the gun-toting, jersey-wearing evil doer is broke, but has apparently "undergone a transformation in order to get his life back in order." Translation: "I'm broke and I need to quit acting like a jackass long enough to get paid."

You know what happens when your No. 1 receiver bellyaches through the entire offseason, your No. 3 receiver is released for clinical stupidity, and you realize that the second- and third-round wideouts you drafted are nowhere near as good as you hoped?

You re-sign the stupid one. Obviously.

We'd mentioned at various points this summer that the Bengals, intrigued by chronic law breakers who are really good at football, had been contemplating giving Chris Henry another chance to prove he can't be as dumb as his arrest record might indicate. And now, it looks like the band's gettin' back together!

The Cincinnati Bengals are close to reaching an agreement with free-agent receiver Chris Henry, a source told ESPN.com Monday night. Henry is en route from Charlotte, N.C., to Cincinnati to sign a contract with the team as early as Tuesday, the source said.

The Bengals refused comment on Henry when contacted by ESPN.com on Monday night.

ESPN's James Walker writes that the team thinks it may have overreacted in cutting Henry after his latest arrest but before the charges were eventually dropped. Maybe.

That Chad Johnson was injured last night, T.J. Houshmandzadeh is battling a hammy, and rookies Jerome Simpson and Andre Caldwell are underperforming, I suppose this move makes perfect sense.

Well, until Henry gets arrested again, anyway.

Training camps are underway, the NFL season is a month off, and to get you ready for 2008, FanHouse previews all 32 teams, "heat index" style. We'll rate each club in 10 categories on a scale of 1 to 10, high score wins.

Quarterback: If there is one constant on this team, it is Carson Palmer. Sure, Palmer didn't have his best season a year ago, but his off seasons are better than many QBs best years. In reality, other things factored into his poor season (injuries to the line, injury to Rudi Johnson, receivers pouting). The only issue here is what happens in Cincinnati if Palmer gets hurt. They have no one groomed to come in. Ryan Fitzpatrick and Jeff Rowe are in their second seasons with the team and Carson's brother, Jordan, is fighting for a spot. Heat Index: 8

Running backs: Injuries have hurt this unit in the past couple of years. Workhorse Rudi Johnson finally hit a wall; Kenny Irons blew out his knee in his first preseason game; Chris Perry has never been able to stay on the field. Well, Rudi and Perry are healthy again, with 2007 surprises Kenny Watson and DeDe Dorsey around to give the offense a different dynamic. Cincy needs this unit to get back to form to allow the entire offense to explode. Heat Index: 4

Receivers: Chad Johnson and T.J. Houshmandzadeh are one of the best receiving combos in the NFL. T.J. tied for the lead in receptions; Chad was third in receiving yards. However, this could be the last season either is in Cincinnati. Johnson's issues with the team are well documented. T.J. is in his final contracted season. Chris Henry is finally gone and there are several guys trying to step into that #3 spot. Rookie Jerome Simpson will get a strong look, as will Andre Caldwell and Antonio Chatman. Chatman is the only one with experience and could get the nod. Heat Index: 8

Hear that? It's the pitter-patter of fantasy football season approaching. Fantasy FanHouse is here to get you ready by previewing every team from a fantasy perspective.

Meet The ...
Chad Johnson media circus. Seriously, dude, just shut up and play. Other than him -- though I doubt he thinks we're all aware there are actually other players on the team -- there's a decent crowd of players here with whom fantasy owners are quite familiar. Rudi Johnson and Carson Palmer are traditional high picks, and T.J. Houshmandzedah has really come on strong as an elite wideout.

The Breakout
As much of a punk as he is, Chris Henry put up numbers in this offense when he was actually on the field. Palmer doesn't utilize his slot receiver like Peyton Manning, but he does it quite well. So will it be Jerome Simpson or Andre Caldwell? Palmer's already raving about the maturity of Caldwell and is weary of the rawness to Simpson. That's enough for me. Andre Caldwell is your Bengals breakout for '07. It's gotta be late in a bigger league before you decide to take him, but he's still got a chance to hit it quasi-big this year in the slot.