FanHouse BaseballTonight

The people at ESPN know what they're talking about. I'm pretty sure Peter Gammons knows more about baseball than anybody else in the world knows about anything else in the world. If you put his baseball knowledge end-to-end it would reach Jupiter. But as I get older I become more and more aware of what ESPN is doing with their sports coverage. I hear them regularly condescend on bloggers and then do exactly what bloggers do - report the news, and make sure to unnecessarily editorialize everything you can.

So when I use my "blog" here to equate Baseball Tonight's editorialized, non-news related commentary to chimps hurling dung at each other and then screaming at their food, please understand that I'm only doing it because of my place in life and the hopelessness of my chosen profession. Without ESPN I wouldn't have known about the last 25 years of my nation's home runs.

After the jump, today's Dugout watches Baseball Tonight, makes a sound like "blergh," and then runs to its computer to anonymously put them in their place.

If you were dying to hear John Kruk and Steve Phillips' indecipherable mutterings on the All-Star Game live and on location this week, you will be sorely disappointed: the Baseball Tonight set has been banned from the All-Star Game by Major League Baseball.

The reason? ESPN went ahead and reported the All-Star rosters before TBS, who had exclusive rights and a show set up specifically for the breathless revelation that Prince Fielder would indeed be the starting first baseman. Now, the Baseball Tonight set will sit idly in the outfield, being utilized by photographers with hair presumably far more voluminous than Krukie's.

Leagues and organizations do this all the time -- one way of dictating news coverage is by carefully negoiating who/what organization receives access to your events. In a way, this is a routine way for Major League Baseball to control its product. But the fact that it involves ESPN -- making clear that the leagues, and not the networks, still maintain the head spot at the power-brokerage table -- sets a precedent here that many ESPN-bashers will love, and the pro leagues will certainly appreciate. Check the nametag, grandma: you're in MLB's world now.

ESPN is still struggling to fill the hole left by Harold Reynolds, whose on-screen presence was somehow magnetic, and whose off-screen trouble eventually got him the boot.

Well, ESPN has tried to replace Reynolds with a variety of former players, including Tino Martinez (horrible) and Orestes Destrada (slightly less horrible). The newest edition? Eric Young, who is so bad he inspired The Juice Blog to come up with a drinking game:

I have figured out a way to make Eric Young nights somewhat fun. Next time EY is on, listen to how he starts almost every sentence with "I tell you what." It really is amazing that a professional broadcaster could continue to do this 2 months into his career. To make the most of this inarticulate style, ESPN needs to promote the Baseball Tonight Drinking Game. Every time that Eric Young says "I tell you what" it's time to do a shot.

Maybe Jagermeister and Red Bull could sponsor the promotion? Actually, the show would really be fun, if everyone on set would drink as well. I could see John Kruk high-fiving EY everytime he says it, as you know he must be able to slam it down. A few jager-bombs and I bet Tim Kurjian would really loosen up. I have to guess that if you go by the first name of Buster (Olney), you might not be Frank the Tank, but you have to be able to hold your own. Have Steve Phillips bartend, as he would look good flipping drinks like he was in Cocktail.

This has loads of potential. I'll tell you what -- I'm calling friends and telling them to bring over the Jager. Let's do this.

(Via: BBTF)