FanHouse BillPlaschke

All is not well in Dodgerland right now. Sure, the McCourt family can be thankful that regardless of the country's economic turmoils, they will always and forever have millions of dollars -- a tough burden to bear for sure. And yes, T.J. Simers and Bill Plaschke should be thankful that they have jobs. Seriously, seriously thankful.

But a holiday doesn't give us a good reason to ignore the weird noise coming from Frank and Jamie re: how they want to use their money -- baseball or society. See, they recently came out and asked the good people of Los Angeles, "Do you want high priced, dreadlocked free agents ... or do you want youth baseball fields?"

"If you bring somebody in to play and pay them, pick a number, $30 million, does that seem a little weird to you?" Jamie McCourt asked in an interview at the Evergreen Recreation Center in East Los Angeles. "That's what we're trying to figure out. We're really trying to see it through the eyes of our fans. We're really trying to understand, would they rather have the 50 fields?"

Ahhh. The glorious nobility of , um, nobility. There's only one problem -- as the 'Courts discuss how to go about distributing what little baseball money they have, they're still, as Simers noted, easily lining their pockets with the hard earned cash of fans.

Ninety dollars a ticket sounds like a lot until you break it down. It's really only nine Anthony Davis autographs, or $410 less than what the Dodgers charged 250 fans each the other night to take batting practice at Dodger Stadium and pose for pictures with Russell Martin and Andre Ethier.

Just another heartwarming story farm Dodger land today, as the team is opening up the media outlet type stuff to various Dodger-bloggers. Sons of Sam Garvey is reporting that tonight, they'll be present in their own media box (read: suite, and see below) at Dodger Stadium (which puts them at a rough 90% better chance to get autographs than any young children) to cover the game in what the team will be promoting as a "blogger conference".

Coincidentally, the next day our buddy Josh-er, the Dodgers' Vice President of Public Relations and Broadcasting Josh Rawitch-announced he is organizing a 'blogger conference' at Friday night's game. In a suite. Yeah, boyee!

Naturally, our first reaction was to conduct a rigorous discussion regarding the ethical ramifications of accepting the team's offer of hospitality. Just kidding. Took us two seconds to RSVP yes. Then the questions started. Will we have to reveal our identities? Will the other bloggers make us sit at the kids' table? Should we blog about the night's experience? What will we wear?

I would suggest pajamas. Or striped warm-up pants that look like you haven't left your mother's basement in five years. And don't forget to find Bill Plaschke and peg him with a hundred VORP lasers. Kidding. This is pretty awesome because it means that, well, you know, bloggers aren't getting completely shut off from access to sports.

And yeah, sure, it appears this is more of a case of "who you know" rather than "what you know" (although SoSG is a very good blog), but let's be honest here -- it's not like every currently credentialed MSM got their gig based solely on their ability to write well. Some of them probably knew someone who knew someone at a paper who got them a gig. Or maybe they just screamed really loudly. I'm still looking forward to the report though.

Spring training has its pluses and minuses. For example, the actual act of attending spring training looks awesome. The fact that baseball is back on sports networks in semi-earnest is awesome. Increasingly warm weather feels awesome. Reading a Bill Plaschke column about the reasons Juan Pierre is going to be the star of the Dodgers this year? Not awesome.

If you'll notice, what I did just there in the above paragraph is write a series of sentences with the same structural composition. Builds momentum, you see. I actually learned it from Plaschke, who learned it from Mastercard commercials, and whose taste for structural composition is sure to be studied in literary circles for ages to come. Go on. See for yourself:

There's a boxer in the house. [...] There's defiance in the house. [...] There's resolve in the house.

Groan.

Fans don't appreciate him. Statisticians can't calculate him. Bloggers downright brutalize him.

Double groan. And yes, Bill, statisticians can calculate Juan Pierre. Calculations: Not very good. And so on:

For just over half a year now, there's been a miniature debate raging in Dodgerland, one pitting Youth, the bane of old baseball men everywhere, versus Experience, friend of Jeff Kent and Luis Gonzalez. The Dodgers are stocked with young talent, the kind hungry for productive at-bats. Still, there are some -- notably Kent and L.A. Times columnist Bill Plaschke -- who believe that the kids should either be traded or shelved in place of "proven" veterans with baseball sense and grit and hustle and veteranness and ouch my head hurts.

It's no question what the smarter move for the franchise is. Rarely does it behoove a team to trade young talent for old; veterans typically make more money and are on the downsides of their careers while young players are the, um, opposite of that. After hearing from both sides of that void, GM Ned Colletti seems to have finally embraced his talented young assets:

Citing the high asking prices for top players on the trade market and the lack of quality among free agents, Dodgers General Manager Ned Colletti said today that he wouldn't "make a deal to make a deal."

That would leave the Dodgers with a team that once again would be short on experience, something Colletti said he didn't mind. Manager Joe Torre echoed similar thoughts.

"There's potential for change, but as we look at the young players that we played a lot this past year, we're less likely to fill in [positions with veterans] as much as we have in the past and more likely we'll give the younger players greater opportunity," Colletti said. "I'm curious to see how our young players, who really had a chance this past year to play full-time, I'm curious to see what another year does."

Not "minding" inexperience? A refusal of "making a deal to make a deal?" Curiosity? Why, it's almost as if Colletti has come to his senses! Quick, someone take a photo!

(HT: Baseball Musings)

It's like week of the clubhouse attendant in baseball. First we had a former Mets employee, Kirk J. Radomski, admit to distributing HGH and other steroids. And now, we have former Dodgers clubhouse attendant Dave Dickenson tell Bill Plaschke in the LA Times about all the dirty clubhouse affairs to which he used to attend.

When the star Dodger routinely showed up for day games still drunk from the previous night, the clubhouse guy knew his role.
...
Dickenson said he would pour a cup of beer and place it in the dugout bathroom. The star player would sneak there between innings for a drink, and continue drinking throughout the game.
...
He said he never saw a steroid at Dodger Stadium. However, he did say that before baseball's amphetamine ban, he would commonly vacuum "greenies" off the floor after games.
...
Dickenson said that when a player was attracted to women in the stands during the games, he would be ordered to bring those women the player's phone numbers.

Bones (Dickenson's nickname) said he would do anything to keep the players happy, including what's listed above. Some of the additional duties mentioned in the article were washing cars, doing laundry for player's families, breaking up fights, and entertaining player's children.

Having actually worked with the Dodgers during the 2004 season, I was partially acquainted with Bones. He was quiet, well-liked by the players, and seemed to keep most of the business to himself. Unfortunately Bones was fired by the team last year, and most likely used the interview as a way to get back at the Dodgers for what he feels was an undeserved termination. Bones was told he was fired because he was getting too close to the players. However, the article raises speculation that Dickenson was fired for insulting one of the McCourt's children (Frank and Jamie McCourt own the Dodgers). Whatever the case, Bones' stories have opened a window into the uglier side of baseball clubhouses and they prove that sometimes the people you think least about, are privy to information you never want revealed.

Previously at FanHouse:
Better Know a Steroid Dealer: Kirk J. Radomski
From the Archive: Mets Locker Room Home to Steroids, Too