Posts tagged BritneySpears at FanHouse

New York-Presbyterian Hospital gave New York Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress special treatment when he showed up with a gunshot wound early Saturday morning, breaking the law by failing to report the injury to police and by filing fraudulent paperwork that referred to him by the name Harris Smith.

But it turns out that at New York-Presbyterian Hospital, giving celebrities preferential treatment -- while ordinary people suffer in the waiting room -- is just standard operating procedure.

There is nothing better than watching a movie with a predictable ending, especially one that ends with the main character dying. The director just sits back thinking, "I'll make you love this guy, embrace him, eat him up and just before you basically can't get enough of him on screen I'll hack him." Leonardo Dicaprio's character in Titanic agrees.

Well, the Dallas Cowboys have been the Titanic, with a little touch of Britney Spears' career with a pinch of Michael Jackson thrown in. Good, decent, struggling, bad, and now pitiful.

I guess that means it is time to check in on America's Team!

When you consider that the Kansas City Royals have scored the least amount of runs of any team in the Majors with 181, and that none of the regulars are currently hitting over .300 on the season, it's pretty easy to see that this team has trouble scoring runs. All of which makes it a lot easier to understand the team's current 8-game losing streak that's dropped them into a tie with the Detroit Tigers for last place in the AL Central.

Now, when a whole team is struggling offensively, it's tough to find that one guy that's sucking like no other. Fortunately for Royals fans, shortstop Tony Pena has made himself a very easy target, though his manager Trey Hillman has no plans on taking him out of the lineup anytime soon.

"I think it goes back to this," manager Trey Hillman said. "If the guys who are supposed to be hitting will just hit, then he's not the issue. The issue is the other guys in the lineup who are hitting one through six on any given day."

Generally, I think that women who are professional athletes and who are viewed as "sexy" in the public eye get more attention than other professional athletes. Sometimes, in fact, they get more attention than other women. Which makes the utter lack of female professional athletes on Maxim's Top 100 list both a little surprising, and given who did make the cut, a little appalling, honestly.

The merits (Marissa Miller at number one) and the demerits (Britney Spears at nineteen) have already been discussed, but seriously, where are the athletes here? The only two athletes that I counted, while doing detailed research that involved clicking on lots of photos, who could remotely qualify were Danica Patrick and Stacy Keibler-- a lady of the WWE -- unless you're willing to count Diora Baird because she decided to putt in a bikini.

These two ladies checked in at 91 and 89 overall, respectively. The problem with that? Well, besides the fact that they are the only athletes even remotely involved, there's also the issue of the ranking here. Because the difference between Danica and Jennifer Love Hewitt (20) is reversed and divisible by ten in non-crazy land.

I would also ask, if we're going to roll with early 90's throwbacks, where is Anna Kournikova? Britney and Christina Aguilera can make this list but not the Russian "tennis" "star"?

After seeing Dontrelle Willis slip and fall on the mound on Friday night at U.S. Cellular Field, I was generally scared for the guy. The way his leg bent, well, it just wasn't natural. As someone who's had a similar type of injury occur to my knee while in high school playing football (Though mine wasn't from slipping on a mound as much as it was from 275 pounds of Henry Hopkins rolling over my leg in practice. Skip a meal, man!), I immediately felt Dontrelle's pain.

Luckily the worst fears were averted when today's MRI results showed no structural damage, just a hyper-extended knee. Unfortunately (or fortunately considering his performance so far this season), that doesn't mean Dontrelle will be able to escape a stop on the disabled list for the first time in his career.

"You know he's going to miss a start, and we don't want to take any chances with it," team president/general manager Dave Dombrowski said. "Really, at this point, we can't. It is a hyperextension, so hopefully in the 15 days, he'll be ready. But we'll see.

"He asked us to wait [to put him on the DL] and see what happens, but you could tell he's walking gingerly, and we just don't want to take a chance. You can't take a chance on that, because his arm is healthy. I've seen many guys in their time when their knee's bothering them a little bit, change their delivery a little bit and hurt their arm."

Obviously the Tigers need another pitcher on the disabled list as much as Britney Spears needs another kid, but as Dombrowski said above, there really is no other option at this point. The Tigers currently plan on calling up Armando Galarraga (I've no idea if he's related to Andres, but for some reason, I hope he is.) from Triple-A Toledo to take Dontrelle's spot in the rotation.

In case you didn't see it 10,000 times while watching the NCAA Tournament the last four days, here's the commercial CBS has been showing during the games to advertise the fact that Britney Spears will be a guest star on How I Met Your Mother:

Is that OK with you? It's not OK with Michael McCarthy of USA Today, who writes:

Worst promo. Who's the genius behind the lame promo during CBS's coverage of the tournament Saturday and Sunday about Britney Spears' appearance on How I Met Your Mother? In the clip from tonight's episode, Spears' flirty receptionist asks Neil Patrick Harris' character if they can have sex, then go shopping. Cute. We know Hollywood loves to outrage the squares in Middle America. But there are kids watching these games.

Although I disagree with McCarthy's apparent opinion that "Hollywood" represents what's immoral about our country while "Middle America" represents what's right, I've long thought that the TV networks show inappropriate content during commercials of sporting events. The best option for parents is to change the channel when the commercials come on.

I was wondering how long it would take somebody to put a video like that on the internet. I mean, when you think about it, Rich Rodriguez has become the Britney Spears of college football. He has court troubles. He can't seem to be civil with his old partner. Bloggers like me can't stop talking about him.

Soon Rich will start dating a Michigan blogger, hopefully not one named Brian Cook, who's only interested in him so he can get some juicy blog posts.

He's the center of the college football coaching universe! Well, until Nick Saban leaves Alabama for a new school anyway.

(Via Wizard of Odds)

Fresh off of another appearance in front of Congress, in which he was forced to defend himself for doing absolutely nothing as baseball immersed itself in steroids, Bud Selig has been given a contract extension.

He'll now be lording over things through 2012.

Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig received a three-year extension through 2012 at the owner's meetings in Scottsdale, Ariz., today. Selig, 73, appeared before Congress this week to testify about the Mitchell Report, which he authorized to examine the history of steroids in baseball.

Details of the contract have not been announced. In 2007, Selig was reported to have earned $14 million.

I guess the feeling here is that Bud was in charge when the mess was made, so now he has to stick around and try to clean it up. I've never exactly been a big fan of Bud, so I cant say that I'm terribly excited by this news. I know that baseball has experienced a huge spike in revenue under Selig, but I'm a fan, not an owner, so none of that means anything to me.

Instead all I see is a commissioner that's bent over backwards to do anything in his power to help owners make money, all the while ignoring the biggest problem in the sport. And don't even get me started on the whole All-Star Game deciding homefield advantage in the World Series.

That decision is on par with Britney Spears' recent choice to have another kid on the intelligence scale.

It's been an awfully long time since the Mid-American Conference landed two teams in the tournament. Britney Spears was a virginal icon to millions when Miami nabbed an at-large bid to the 1999 dance. Both Spears and the MAC have slipped a lot since then and both have themselves to blame for many of their problems.

For more on Spears, check out TMZ, but the root of some of the MAC's problems can be found in their divisional structure. The East has the league's four highest ranked schools via RPI while the West is without a team featuring a winning record this morning. That leaves the East to play their version of a political primary season. They spend all their energy taking each other down which ultimately serves to make them a weaker candidate for national honors. The West champ, meanwhile, gets a bye in the conference tournament that they don't deserve.

It's been that way for a while. The six West teams have had six winning records over the past three seasons compared to 15 such seasons on the Eastern side. That's exactly why the league hasn't gotten any at-large bids. It's not going to change this season unless Kent State (13-3, 39 RPI) runs away with the East but doesn't win the tournament.

Somebody at the NY Post is thinking outside the box. They gave 50 yard line seats three rows behind the Cowboy bench to a Jessica Simpson lookalike they hired to jinx Dallas quarterback Tony Romo.

Here's the gallery of pictures that they took of faux Jessica. What do you think of the resemblance?

The Post takes credit for the victory:

The stunner's Simpson-esque vibes must have made the difference - Romo's final drive was stopped short of the end zone.

You're welcome, New York!

I guess Romo can take comfort that his dating life isn't as high profile strange as dating Britney Spears, but it's pretty ridiculously close if newspapers are hiring jinxing clones and Terrell Owens come up with his own version of "Leave Tony Romo alone!" (the previous link is TO, and the above link is a YouTubed fan effort.)

(HT: With Leather)

Previously at FanHouse:
Everything Romessica