NEW YORK -- A little more than two hours before the first pitch of tonight's exhibition game between the Yankees and the Cubs, I found myself in the visitors dugout, where Cubs players were milling about, checking out the new Stadium. (Yes, we capitalize "Stadium" when we talk about the one the Yankees play in.)
"Nothing's changed," Cubs pitcher Chad Gaudin said, looking out at the field and pointing. "The lines, the alleys, you had the bullpens right there in the same places. It's the same."
Gaudin sounded disappointing, and while his analysis had some holes (one of the bullpens is in right-center and the other in left-center -- in the old Stadium they were next to each other in left), his fundamental point was a decent one.
NEW YORK - There's nothing unusual about ballplayers having pictures of their families hanging in their lockers. But at the new Yankee Stadium, everything's new and snazzy and ... at least a little different from what you're used to. So when you enter the cavernous home clubhouse, with its plush Yankee carpeting, ultracomfy-looking leather chairs and huge flat screen TVs (all tuned to the YES Network, of course), you notice the pictures hanging up on the lockers. And then you notice what's different about them.
This morning, we hope to get inside the mentality of these gangster rappers and come to some societal conclusions, and though we don't have the hilarious narrator from The History Channel's "Gangland" ("One day, he was leaving a Church's Chicken! when several Crips members surprised him") but we're doing the best with what we have.
Today's jump is real, naw'mean, after the jump. Ya feel me?
The Dugout is all about character growth. From day one we've watched Kyle Farnsworth evolve from a fan-kicking sociopath into the literal onion of psychological human study he has become. We've watched Jim Thome grow from a rosy-cheeked manchild with pee on his hat into a rosy-cheeked manchild with socks on his hat. Dmitri Young has eaten Fruit by the Foot and then forgotten what Fruit by the Foot is. Seasons change, time goes on, and life ebbs and flows.
This year, the Chicago Cubs will be different, at least in the multiverse of The Dugout. Dusty Baker is in Cincinnati. Mark Prior is in San Diego. And unless Kerry Wood walks too close to an unsupervised swimming pool or something the Cubs should be a young, talented, heavy-hitting force to be reckoned with.
After the jump: The Cubbies - positive and ready for action in a world where nothing could possibly go wrong.
You think Lou Piniella has tantrums? You think Tony La Russa gets ornery with the press? They pale in comparison to the master, Lee Elia. We're a day late from hitting the relevance on the head, but as Ben Maller points out, yesterday marked the 24th anniversary of Elia's famous tirade to reporters about Wrigley Field's bleacher bums.
(Warning: lots and lots of explicit language is in the following clip -- 43 curse words in three minutes, to be exact -- but that's kind of the point, really.)
"The MF'ers don't even work! That's why they're out at the F-ing game! ... Eight-five percent of the F-ing world is working -- the other fifteen come out here!"
Can you imagine a manager calling out the fan base like that today? I'm not sure if he'd even make it out of the clubhouse before getting canned. Elia kept his job, though, at least for a little while: he was eventually fired later that summer after posting a 54-69 record.
Elia is still in baseball, bouncing around various organizations as a coach and scout (most recently serving as Baltimore's bench coach last year), but I'm guessing his bosses these days try to keep him as far away from the media -- and season ticket holders -- as possible.
The Fanhouse's look at the day's most intriguing matchups
Chicago Cubs (3-6) vs. Cincinnati Reds (6-4)-1:05PM Est.
He's only nine games into his tenure as manager of the Chicago Cubs and Lou Piniella is already tired of his team. After the way Big Z and the pen blew yesterday's 5-0 lead it's pretty obvious that no matter how much money they spend, or who they bring in to manage, they're still the Chicago Cubs. I can't wait until Rich Hill gets into trouble and Piniella comes to the mound. "What's wrong, Skip?" Piniella then rips Hill's heart out and bites into it. "Nothing."
Pittsburgh Pirates (4-6) vs. San Francisco Giants (3-7)-7:05PM Est.
Barry sure did have a happy homecoming to Pittsburgh on Friday didn't he? Two home runs, four RBI, and a Giants romp. If Barry played the Pirates everyday he'd catch Hank Aaron by Thursday. This game will also be Barry Zito's third attempt to get his first win as a Giant. So far he's making $15.59 million for every point on his 8.08 ERA. Also, as far as the Pirates are concerned, remember when they were 3-0 and in control of the NL Central? Boy, those were the days.
Boston Red Sox (5-4) vs. Los Angeles Angels (6-5)-FOX 3:55PM Est.
Something tells me that sitting around all week hearing nothing but talk of Daisuke Matsuzaka will arouse the fire that's dormant in the innermost recesses of his soul. So I'd expect a very philosphical performance from the pitcher turned blogger this afternoon. Hector Carrasco will make the start for the Angels in place of Kelvim Escobar as the Angels continue to rack up injured starters like Britney does new wigs.
Here he is in the above video, doing what many others before him have -- singing "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" at Wrigley field during the seventh inning stretch.
He follows a long list of woeful singers at the Friendly Confines -- Jeff Gordon (who called Wrigley Field "Wrigley Stadium" whoops!) Mike Ditka, Danica Patrick and Ozzy Osbourne. And those are the few I can think of off the top of my head right now.
Why these people subject themselves to such outright and obvious impending embarrassment is sometimes beyond me. Although, this is coming from a guy who sits at home in front of his laptop all day, so at least they're, you know, getting out of the house.
And just for fun, I added in the Jeff Gordon and Danica Patrick performances after the jump. Because, well, they're worth another glance.
Speaking of the Cubs' impending sale, one of the most serious issues any future Cubs owner will have to deal with is the Morass That Is Wrigley Field, one of America's favorite -- and most deteriorated -- ballparks.
Everyone in the Chicago area is weighing in on this topic, and solutions have ranged from moving the Cubs to the suburbs in a new, vintage-style ballpark to keeping things as is and simply budgeting for the likely $100 million needed to fix the current stadium.
Mariotti goes on to say that the grandstand could and should be reconstructed (and I agree), leaving the bleachers, brick walls and ivy, scoreboard, and other things that make Wrigley Field what it is. Elsewhere in the Sun-Times today, writer Neil Hayes says the model for how to do this is what the new Red Sox owners did with Fenway Park.
To be perfectly honest, I agree too. $100 million is too much to pay for simple structural renovations. Much of this will depend on the owner and his willingness to spend -- and maybe this is where Mark Cuban comes in -- but the idea that a new Wrigley could be built in the same spot, and with room for new revenue streams, doesn't seem all that unlikely. Keep the things that make Wrigley great (especially the bleacher fans) and rebuild the rest.
That beats fixing falling concrete forever, or watching games in Schaumburg, Ill.
"They're not for sale yet, so I don't know," Cuban said Monday, one week after the announcement of the planned sale by Sam Zell, the real estate magnate who is buying the team's parent company.
"I don't even know what is for sale when they do try to sell, so there's nothing really to comment on. There's nothing to speculate on until they put it up for sale."
Luckily for you guys, I've got my handy-dandy "Mark Cuban comment translator"* right here on my desk. Here's what Cubes meant:
Yeah, I want to buy the Cubs. But if I tell you that right now, I get to hear all summer what a crappy owner I'd be while people fight over whether or not I get to own a baseball team. On top of that, Pirate fans will commit ritual suicide when the announcement comes that I've bought a franchise that isn't theirs and being from Pittsburgh, I kinda feel sad for them. So for now, I'm gonna sit here and be quiet and pretend like I'm not interested, but Jim Hendry, if you don't sign Zambrano to an extension before I get there, you're the first to go.
If Cuban doesn't make a bid on the Cubs, I'll be absolutely shocked.
*- This device may or may not actually exist. And by that I mean it exists in my head only.
Here's a predictable story for you: the Houston Astros took a two run lead into the ninth inning this afternoon and with Dan Wheeler taking over for Brad Lidge as closer they actually held on to it. Wheeler retired the Cubs in order in the ninth tonight to pick up his first save of the season and preserve the Astros' 5-3 win over the Cubs.
Of course, as much of a relief as it was for Astros' fans to see Wheeler nail down the ninth, Cubs' fans again had to suffer through a bullpen meltdown. After falling behind 3-0 through five innings the Cubs fought back to tie the game at 3 going into the eighth, only to watch Bob Howry surrender a two run homer to noted home run hitter Adam Everett (six in 566 PAs last year) and give the Astros their margin of victory. That's the second time in the past seven days that Howry has been part of a Cubby bullpen failing, if you're counting at home.
Let's see, what else happened here... Ted Lily pitched pretty OK in his second start as a Cub (six innings, six hits, three runs, five Ks, one walk), but wasn't nearly as dominant as he was in his first start. Woody Williams was much improved over his first start for the 'Stros, but he was pretty awful in his first start so pretty much that just means he was OK. Craig Biggio had two doubles and scored twice for Houston. That gives him eight hits on the year and puts him 62 shy of 3,000. I would ask if you could feel the excitement, but this whole thing kind of feels like the steamroller scene in Austin Powers to me.
NEW YORK -- A little more than two hours before the first pitch of tonight's exhibition game between the Yankees and the Cubs, I found myself in the visitors dugout, where Cubs players were milling about, checking out the new Stadium. (Yes, we capitalize "Stadium" when we talk about the one the Yankees play in.)
NEW YORK - There's nothing unusual about ballplayers having pictures of their families hanging in their lockers. But at the new Yankee Stadium, everything's new and snazzy and ... at least a little different from what you're used to. So when you enter the cavernous home clubhouse, with its plush Yankee carpeting, ultracomfy-looking leather chairs and huge flat screen TVs (all tuned to the 
It's not quite 
The Dugout is all about character growth. From day one we've watched Kyle Farnsworth evolve from a fan-kicking sociopath into the literal onion of psychological human study he has become. We've watched Jim Thome grow from a rosy-cheeked manchild with pee on his hat into a rosy-cheeked manchild with socks on his hat. Dmitri Young has eaten Fruit by the Foot and then forgotten what Fruit by the Foot is. Seasons change, time goes on, and life ebbs and flows.
Speaking of 
With the announcement that 
Here's a predictable story for you: the Houston Astros took a two run lead into the ninth inning this afternoon and 
