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Beware the Dugouts of March: The Arizona Diamondbacks' 2009 Preview



Jon was supposed to cover the Diamondbacks yesterday to close out our Spring preview of the NL West, but he got busy and I will be taking over today. I know you were expecting something wacky and facetious, but this is the Diamondbacks, and Arizona is a franchise deserving only the most reserved, tactful perspective. My original idea was to cover all of the new faces in the ballpark this year and the ramifications of agism and maturity in baseball, but then I remembered that D. Baxter the Bobcat was arrested for DUI and all I could type was "lol" with a bunch of o's in the middle. As a Cleveland resident, I eagerly await the story about Slider punching a woman in the face.

Today's Dugout is after the jump.

Diamondbacks Mascot Fired for DUI

Here's a tip for the mascots of the world. If you want to keep your job, then don't smoke pot, drink until your BAC is 0.155, and then drive your vehicle 95 miles per hour on a highway. If you should choose to do those things -- which, again, are definitely really stupid -- then you probably shouldn't leave your mascot costume in the back seat. Not that the team wouldn't find out anyway, but there's really no reason to leave a please fire me sign in plain sight.



Yet, that's exactly what David Hamilton did last Sept. 10 in the Phoenix area.

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