FanHouse DeanSpanos

LaDainian Tomlinson and the San Diego Chargers have finally ended their offseason-long soap opera by agreeing on a three-year contract that restructures the running back's original deal.

While "LdT" will take some reductions in his 2010 and 2011 base-compensation numbers, he'll now make the same amount he was originally scheduled to earn in 2009: $6.75 million, which, not coincidentally, is $1.75 million more than Darren Sproles will earn if he signs the team's franchise tender.

Last week, Chargers running back LaDainian Tomlinson used the power of the internet to get his message out, telling fans that he has no intentions of leaving San Diego, and any decisions would be left up to the front office.

So naturally, general manager A.J. Smith responded to Tomlinson by ... mocking him. Hardly seems like the best way to assuage any concerns LdT might have about his future with the team, and that might explain why linebacker Shawne Merriman has seen fit to get involved.

As mentioned yesterday, the LaDainian Tomlinson trade rumors have been everything all at once. They've been alive, they've been ignored, they've been white hot, and they've been ridiculous. And now, they're suddenly nothing altogether.

At least that's the word from San Diego, where it appears that LdT and president Dean Spanos had a little chat. This discussion included -- mainly -- the fact that Tomlinson is not currently on the trading block. Insomuch, anyway, as there have been no discussions with any other teams about trading Tomlinson.

Warren Sapp, fresh off not winning Dancing With the Stars, returned to his full-time job as teevee analyst for NFL Network. During GameDay Morning, Kara Henderson, in San Diego for today's Falcons-Chargers game, asked Sapp about embattled coach Norv Turner, who has "led" San Diego to a 4-7 record in one of the worst divisions in football.

Sapp, who verbalizes every thought that comes into his brain, was predictably frank:

"I tell you what, [owner] Dean Spanos and [general manager] A.J. Smith need to do their homework because the two years I played with Norv Turner, we did not practice the two-minute offense or defense one time. So when you look at the game last week ... and Norv using his timeouts in a bad situation, that's why.

He does not practice time management in a game; I've been with him two years -- he don't do it.

Sapp's GameDay Morning co-analyst, Marshall Faulk, was shocked by the revelation: "I don't know how you can get by in the NFL and not go over two-minute offense ... that's impossible."

Apparently, you "get by" by going 4-7.

Now, I have no reason to believe Sapp is making stuff up, but I also find it damn near impossible to think Turner doesn't devote at least some practice time to the two-minute drill. Wherever the truth may lie, Norval Eugene's job is safe for 2009, which must make Chargers fans very happy.

It might seem silly to even suggest that the Chargers should fire Norval Eugene Turner, given that he led the team to an 11-5 record last season, and was able to accomplish something Mary Schottenheimer never could in his five years on the job: a playoff win. And Norv did it twice in seven days. Not too shabby.

Of course, Schottenheimer lost his job after a 14-win campaign, and Turner was staring at 1-3 one month into the gig. Now, the Chargers are 4-6, the playoffs are virtually out of reach, the defense is in shambles, LaDainian Tomlinson's next breakout game will be his first, and the fans are getting restless.

But team president Dean Spanos is staying the course, which means: more Norv for everybody!

"I'm committed to him," team president Dean Spanos told The San Diego Union-Tribune on Wednesday morning. "I believe in him. It's ridiculous to think he's not going to be back." ...

"He's coming back," General Manager A.J. Smith said "... We are extremely happy with the first year with the man we hired and where we're heading. "We're disappointed with the win-loss record (this season) but not in the coach."

Every week, NFL FanHouse hits the lowlights from Sunday's action, looking at those players who did the most to move their head coaches that much closer to returning to the Bed and Breakfast business.

Norv Turner, Chargers
I suppose I could cut and paste the diatribe from last week, but that would just be lazy. Kinda like Chargers general manager A.J. Smith, who fired Marty Schottenheimer after winning 14 games last year, and then hired Norvell, presumably because his resume was at the top of the pile. Instead, I'll channel FanHouse's Michael David Smith, who thinks Chargers' owner Dean Spanos should get Schottenheimer on the horn, and have the following convo:

"Hey, Marty. Remember back in February, when I fired you? Yeah, how about we take a do-over on that? What's that? You want me to fire A.J. Smith? Done. The locksmith is on his way to A.J.'s office door as we speak. You said you want to be the highest-paid coach in the league? Sure. You want your brother to be your assistant head coach? You got it. Whatever you want, just please, come back and coach our team, right now."

This won't happen, but it should. Smith may be great at putting together a roster, but if there's no one to coach 'em up, it doesn't really matter. I'll conservatively set the over/under for Turner's firing at Week 7.

Trent Green, Dolphins
I would love to give this honor to linebacker Joey Porter -- he did guarantee a victory, after all -- but Trent Green went above and beyond the normal requirements to earn the distinction.