Christmas decorations begin in late August, and now the ClayNation Hypesman Watch (CHW) is here in the first week of May. It's part of a new term, I just coined: Heisman Creep. (And it has nothing to do with Maurice Clarett). We're going to try something radical here, every other week or so we'll drop in and give you a top 10 list for Heisman candidates. Even though most of them are finishing their spring finals right about now. The goal is to ridicule the Heisman obsession, keep us entertained, and write about the Heisman in a way no one else is.
And, plainly, it's never too early to start debating the most over-hyped award this side of a kindergarten valedictorian.
In "Rough Draft," lawyer-turned-writer-turned-football-player Clay Travis recounts his experience training for the 2008 NFL draft alongside some future pros. The following is Part 10 of 10 (read Chapter 9 here) installments that FanHouse will roll out every weekday leading up to the 2009 NFL Draft on April 25.
At 6:35 in the morning, gray mist encircles the stone barracks of West Point. First-year cadets stand in the hallways counting down the minutes until formation, Cadet Caleb Campbell tucks in the corner of his bed, the green cover tight and without wrinkles. He adjusts his hat and steps outside of Eisenhower Barracks room E313. It's 6:39 in the morning. Look quickly across the timeless cadet procession standing in the courtyard, past the parade ground bleachers that say Beat Navy, and it could be any year, any time, but only one place: West Point at morning.
In "Rough Draft," lawyer-turned-writer-turned-football-player Clay Travis recounts his experience training for the 2008 NFL draft alongside some future pros. The following is Part 9 of 10 (read Chapter 8 here) installments that FanHouse will roll out every weekday leading up to the 2009 NFL Draft on April 25.
The corner of Craig Stevens' left eye is twitching. He can't stop it. We're sitting across the table from one another and again and again the eye twitches, a metronome of ocular discomfort.
"Can you see it?" he asks.
"Yeah," I say.
He nods, flexes his arms on the table, "I can't get it to stop. I was really worried about it, but then my girlfriend told me that sometimes your eye can start twitching when you get really stressed."
"Has your eye ever done this? Before a big game or anything like that?" I ask.
"No," Stevens says, "I think it's going to stop as soon as I finish the combine."
In "Rough Draft," lawyer-turned-writer-turned-football-player Clay Travis recounts his experience training for the 2008 NFL draft alongside some future pros. The following is Part 8 of 10 (read chapter 7 here) installments that FanHouse will roll out every weekday leading up to the 2009 NFL Draft on April 25.
It's a little more than two weeks until the NFL Combine and Kurt Hester remains furious with our forty starts.
"Y'all are starting like a bunch of p*****s," he says, "They're f**king horrible."
So horrible, in fact, that for our morning workout Hester has been forced to dig into his massive collection of workout supplies, stored in large plastic blue bins. Desperation has driven Hester to pull out Velcro belts that he can fasten to our waists. In Hester's terminology these are called pop belts.
"They don't even make these anymore," says Hester as he distributes the pop belts to us. "I had to break them out of the bottom of the bins because y'all just weren't listening to me about getting good first steps."
In "Rough Draft," lawyer-turned-writer-turned-football-player Clay Travis recounts his experience training for the 2008 NFL draft alongside some future pros. The following is Part 7 of 10 installments (read Part 6 here) that FanHouse will roll out every weekday leading up to the 2009 NFL Draft on April 25.
Our forty times are not improving. And Kurt Hester is coming undone over our continued failure. With less than a month to go until the combine, Hester sets up six taped lines on the field at a distance of ten yards. "I want y'all to try and run ten yards in six steps," he says. The idea behind the tape strips is to make us take longer strides so that we can get out of our starts faster. I do my best to make my strides match the six pieces of tape, but they're too far apart for me to cover in only six steps.
In "Rough Draft," lawyer-turned-writer-turned-football-player Clay Travis recounts his experience training for the 2008 NFL draft alongside some future pros. The following is Part 6 of 10 installments (read Part 5 here) that FanHouse will roll out every weekday leading up to the 2009 NFL Draft on April 25.
None of those stresses of the guys I'm training with compares to Army's Caleb Campbell (right), a 6'2" 229 pound safety from Perryton, Texas. His future plans are extraordinarily simple: either he's drafted by an NFL team or he's likely shipped to Iraq as a 2nd Lieutenant. Campbell doesn't announce this to the rest of the guys he's training with. Instead he confides it to me one afternoon as I review his NFL Combine questionnaire. One minute we're talking about Wolf from the new American Gladiators television show, and the next moment Campbell unburdens himself. "I need this Bookman," Campbell says, "or else my ass is headed to Iraq."
In "Rough Draft," lawyer-turned-writer-turned-football-player Clay Travis recounts his experience training for the 2008 NFL draft alongside some future pros. The following is Part 4 of 10 installments (read Part 3 here) that FanHouse will roll out every weekday leading up to the 2009 NFL Draft on April 25.
As the days dwindle for Michael Oher (right) to decide whether to leave school early or return to Ole Miss, we end another workout and gather in front of the television. The Program, the 1993 college football movie starring Omar Epps, Halle Berry, and Craig Sheffer, as quarterback Joe Cane, is on the television.
For the first time I feel old since most of these guys were in first or second grade in 1993, when the movie came out. In fact, the majority of the guys haven't ever seen the movie before. As we watch, in one scene the starting quarterback, Joe Cane, complains because his father has never come to see him play a football game. Sitting in a large red chair to the left of the television, Big Mike Oher reacts. "Never come to see him play a football game?" asks Oher, scoffing. "I've only seen my own dad about four times."
In "Rough Draft," lawyer-turned-writer-turned-football-player Clay Travis recounts his experience training for the 2008 NFL draft alongside some future pros. The following is Part 2 of 10 installments (read Part 1 here) that FanHouse will roll out every weekday leading up to the 2009 NFL Draft on April 25.
The night before the first day of combine training, I can't sleep. It's Sunday January 6, and all of the college players are being picked up at the airport and brought to their apartments. By now I know a couple of their names, Frank Okam (far right) defensive tackle from Texas, Caleb Campbell safety from Army, and a few other vague designations, a tight end from Cal, a linebacker from Illinois. Late at night, unable to sleep, I climb out of bed and go downstairs to the computer where I spend over an hour scanning through player rosters and player bios.
Because the NFL season never ends, we present our 2009 Offseason Roadmaps for front offices to navigate through the summer.
How many years were the Arizona Cardinals picked to finally have their breakout year? It seems like they were the dark horse pick to have a playoff run every offseason. But since they went to the Super Bowl last year, they can't be that sneaky hot team any more.
Maybe the Texans take over that spot. Their franchise has never had a winning season, and the last two 8-8 seasons have only resulted in higher expectations. Houston's offense ranks about the same as the Cardinal offense, their special teams is better and their defense worse. The Texans are trying to fix that bad defense by replacing a number of coaches on that side of the ball.
In their first drive last week, the Vikings offense scored against the Texans defense in 4 plays. It was a typical start to a Texans game. They have by far worst red zone defense in the league, allowing touchdowns 17 of 25 times for a 81 percent red zone rate. The 213 points the Texans have allowed is 4th most in the AFC.
Football Outsiders currently has the Texans defense ranked 30th (compared to 12th for the offense and 4th for special teams). They ranked the Texans pass defense at 21 and the rush defense last in the league. I believe that most of the pass defense improvement in recent weeks is that teams know the Texans rush defense is garbage, and also they have faced a parade of horrible QBs (Orlowsky, Fitzpatrick, Frerotte).
Hey, but there has been some improvement right? Maybe this young defense is figuring it out? Perhaps if you live in blind optimism land, but this week, a thin defense limited in playmakers has become thinner.
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Because the NFL season never ends, we present our 
In their first drive last week, the Vikings offense scored against the Texans defense in 4 plays. It was a typical start to a Texans game. They have by far 
