Hockey Nerd Tuesday examines those who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
The New York Rangers are pushing for a playoff berth in an Eastern Conference that is as competitive as its been in years. They're going to need all the support they can get: From players, from fans, and especially from the burgeoning hockey hamster community.
Marcel the Hamster has appeared in several Rangers fan-made videos posted by "rangersaltec" on YouTube. The crude animation and liberal use of small mammals holds a particular nostalgia for me, as it hearkens back to the "Citizen Kane" of rodent Web videos: The classic "Gonads and Strife." (NSFW, language.) In this episode, "Marcel's Playoff Push," our Blueshirt fanatic hamster viciously assaults Sidney Crosby and shoots a puck into the mouth of a sock puppet, to the tune of the Rangers' goal song. There are also appearances by Sean Avery and a squirrel in a cheerleader's uniform. Yes, it is as strange as it sounds.
Hockey Nerd Tuesday examines those who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
Scott Stratten seems like a happy and successful guy, serving as the president for Un-Marketing, a Canadian marketing firm. But the truth is that he's been in a long-term abusive relationship ... with the Toronto Maple Leafs.
The following (rather hilarious) video features the bitter end of his love affair with the Boys in the Blue Pajamas. Among his reasons: "Forty-one years without going all the way is way too long of a dry spell"; "I yearn for Bester and Wregget between the pipes"; "I need to leave this retirement home for decrepit NHL players and move somewhere else."
As he mentions at the end of the video, he's willing to be wooed by another team, and can be reached by e-mail at noleafsno@un-marketing.com. But for now: "Please just go Leafs ... go."
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
If I attempted to draw a caricature of Nicklas Backstrom of the Washington Capitals, it would look like a post-bender Owen Wilson stuffed into a Pepsi can. Which is to say that it wouldn't look nearly as good as Paul Nichols's awesome work pictured here.
Nichols has a new blog called Capitals Art where he appears to be slowly cartooning his way through the Washington roster, having already drawn players like Donald Brashear and Olie Kolzig. (I'm hoping Olie doesn't get around to discovering his caricature, because his forehead is about a 27-head. The guy's got a temper.)
Nichols's other cartooning site doesn't exactly appeal to my Blue State sensibilities, but one of the great things about hockey fandom is the way ideology and politics usually stay out of the rink. He's got an eye for these Washington players, and I'm looking forward to seeing what he does next. In fact, he's looking for fans to select which former Capital he'll take a crack at: Rod Langway, Dale Hunter, Mike Gartner or Dennis Maruk. Might I suggest Option B, with a goofy drawing of Pierre Turgeon in celebratory anguish crumbled on the ice next to him?
I'm not typically a fan of bubble hockey in the arcade (do they still have arcades? Wyshynski = old) because I felt the mobility of those big, bulky players was too limited in comparison to table-top rod hockey games. Every player had a stick the size of the Washington Monument, so the ice surface didn't provide for much strategy, either. You basically spun the rods like a mad man until you attempted to jam the puck into the goal with one well-timed thrust. (A buddy of mine used to refer to this technique as the "John Holmes attack.")
This video, which has something to do with the burgeoning underground North American Bubble Hockey Association scene, has shown me the light. I was mesmerized, and not just because there's enough techno music on the soundtrack to make you want to drop some 'E' and grab a glow stick. It's like watching a master shooter run the table in a billiards hall. There's a shot about 1 minute, 50 second into the video that starts in the defensive zone, banks off a winger and lands perfectly in front of the goal. You could lock me in my rec room with a protractor for three weeks and I probably couldn't repeat it. Take a gander, and check out other bubble hockey videos on YouTube.
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a weekly feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
No, it hasn't been a banner year for a franchise that hasn't raised one worth a damn since 1967 ... but that doesn't mean we shouldn't continue to take joy in raking the Leafs. Hockey Nerd Tuesday focuses on two puckheads whose hatred of Toronto knows no bounds -- not the fact that the Leafs aren't even playing in the game they're attending in Ottawa, not even the sanctity of the Canadian National Anthem. Check out the 53-second mark and beyond of this YouTube video, as the television cameras attempt (and fail) to censor the vulgar truth about the 2007-08 Maple Leafs.
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a weekly feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a weekly feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
Gareth is a 25-year-old from Canada who posts under the name "nights10102" on YouTube. After watching a string of violent incidents involving Philadelphia Flyers players this season -- Steve Downie,Jesse Boulerice and now Randy Jones's hit on Patrice Bergeron -- he's seen enough and wants the NHL to fine the coach, fine the general manager and fine the team "over a million dollars" for this thuggery. Here's a quote from the emotional NSFW video below; in an effort to maintain the family-friendly atmosphere of FanHouse, I have replaced his expletives with the less offensive "Niittymaki":
"Basically, what I want to know is why the (Niittymaki) the NHL hasn't fined the Philadelphia Flyers a whole (Niittymaki)-load of money. They've put a team on the ice that has no respect for the rules, has no respect for their fellow players, and has no respect for the fans or the NHL or anything at all. They're basically just a bunch of criminals."
As expected, Flyers fans didn't take too kindly to this constructive criticism, peppering the comments section of the YouTube page with rebuttals like "You are a waste of life. Go comb your hair with a shotgun," and the more colorful "(Niittymaki) a (Niittymaki) panty waste. You are a pethetic little worm. Get a life you (Niittymaki) (Niittymaki) puke." Gareth posted a rambling and neutered video response recently; that tepid, humbled counter-punch -- and the fact that in his latest video, he looks like Jon Favreau after a sleepless weekend in Vegas -- points to one conclusion: As the title of the video says, "Don't Mess With Philly!"
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a weekly feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
"OK, let's see: F-L-O-P-P"... oh, excuse me, I was writing my own caption for the photo. As you can see, our greaser friend is quite pleased that a real live NHL (at the time) star is signing his jersey during Fan Appreciation Day in Philadelphia, when the players literally give Flyers fanatics the sweaters off their backs and the fans agree not to pelt them with 9-volts.
Autographs are an important facet of the paying customer/pampered athlete relationship in any sport, but since hockey players are the most down-to-Earth and approachable cool guys in the pros, getting some ink on your jersey or a hat or on your Willa Ford poster (Mike Modano only) is typically easy -- especially since I believe the new CBA linked player salaries with the number of pucks they sign. Or something like that.
Some may consider getting an autograph from a hockey player to be an art. If that's the case, then may I suggest that "Kuch" is our modern-day Rembrandt.
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a weekly feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? E-mail Greg Wyshynski with the details.
The video below is an odd mix of Courtney's rantings about the Lightning superstar and what appears to be a glimpse into her fantasies about him. In the span of a few seconds, Courtney gives us the universal symbol for "doin' it," screams in a guttural voice that "Vinny's No. 1," and then feverishly licks what appears to be a Lecavalier lapel pin. We then see a montage of Vinny glamour shots and candid photos featuring Lecavalier with his stalker No. 1 Fan, Courtney, while the haunting theme from "Brokeback Mountain" plays. No, I don't know what that says about her intentions...
Make sure you stay until the end, as Eric Carmen's "Hungry Eyes" plays and we move in closer and closer and closer into Vinny's dreamy pupils; so close that you can actually see him thinking about playing for the Habs one day.
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? 
Hockey Nerd Tuesday is a weekly feature on NHL FanHouse that chronicles the stat-heads, gear geeks and fanboys (and girls) who spend an uncomfortable amount of time putting the "fan" in fanatic. Have a hockey nerd you'd like to see featured? 
