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Ravens Are Interested in Chris Simms, Are Dark Horse Candidates to Win the Division


At least the Ravens didn't wait until the last minute. Kyle Boller's bum shoulder could put his season in jeopardy, and Troy Smith's Level 5 tummyache forced him to miss the final two preseason games. Which meant that rookie first-round pick Joe Flacco was the depth chart.

Baltimore signed backup Casey Bramlet long enough to cut him, but they're still in the market for a longer-term solution behind whoever ends up winning the starting job.

Ideally, Smith would be ready to go this week and Flacco would get comfortable holding a clipboard for the '08 season as the No. 3 option. One problem: with Boller's future in doubt, the team doesn't have a veteran backup. Luckily, plenty of semi-qualified names hit the open market yesterday, which is potentially good news for the Ravens.

Colts Will Go With Two Quarterbacks, Neither of Whom Are Named Lorenzen or Gray

When the news broke in mid-July that Peyton Manning would be out 4-6 weeks after having knee surgery, the focus immediately turned to his backup, Jim Sorgi. The fifth-year pro out of Wisconsin seems perfectly capable of stalking the sidelines and feigning interest during the regular season, but anything more than mop-up duty is cause for alarm among the Colts faithful.

And then Sorgi goes down with a bum leg during the preseason -- nothing serious, but enough to keep him out of action just in case you-know-who isn't ready for the regular season -- meaning that there's a very real chance Jared Lorenzen or Quinn Gray make the final 53.

Didn't happen. Manning declared he'll play in Week 1, Sorgi will resume his rightful place next to Tom Moore, and J-Load and ThrowPix6 are out of work. To be fair, neither player showed much in the last month; Lorenzen played like he was hungover on cake, and Gray threw enough interceptions to make you think he was really left-handed.

In less depressing news, sixth-round pick Mike Hart made the roster. In fact, every one of the Colts' '08 selections are currently on the team, which is pretty impressive.

Quinn Gray May Have Just Signed His Own Pink Slip

The new Lucas Oil Field looks awesome (anyone who has seen this thing as you head to downtown Indianapolis knows this). What happened during the building's opening tonight wasn't.

Peyton Manning hasn't played all preseason after "minor" knee surgery and Jim Sorgi was benched due to a gimpy knee. What we had on Sunday night was a battle royale for the Colts third string QB spot ... and it was sad.

Jared Lorenzen did nothing great ... going 7-for-11 with 52 yards. He led the Colts on four drives with three ending in four plays or less. Lorenzen did move the Colts offense one time, but he and Joseph Addai missed an exchange and turned the ball over. He didn't do anything to snatch the job up ... but he didn't do anything to kill it either.

Quinn Gray may have.

Gray threw four interceptions ... including an extremely poor pass deep inside Bills territory. Courtney Roby's spectacular return started the Colts inside Bills territory. Two plays later, Gray overthrew a receiver who jumped and tipped the pass which was intercepted. Gray was on the run, threw off-balanced and made a horrible decision.

Ahmad Bradshaw Apparently Enjoyed Incarceration More Than Most

Giants running back Ahmad Bradshaw might've come into the league as a seventh-round afterthought, but he got the full-on Eli Manning-after-winning-the-Super Bowl treatment during his 30-day jail stay earlier this summer. Well, at least from the correctional officers; the inmates, presumably more interested in doing their time and getting on with their lives, were less impressed with the world champion backup running back gracing them with his presence.

According to the Bristol Herald Courier's Michael Owens, Bradshaw got the star treatment to keep him safe while incarcerated.
Stardom earned the Super Bowl standout a spot in a maximum-security wing to keep him segregated from the rest of the inmates, both jail sources said. "One guard did tell me, 'He's a football player. We're going to keep everyone from him,' " the inmate said.

Much of the grumbling over Bradshaw's preferential treatment focused on the extra meals and daily workouts – four hours a day of recreation time instead of the customary one hour afforded other inmates.
Apparently, extra meals go to pregnant inmates, which is worth keeping in mind if Jared Lorenzen ever finds himself behind bars (too easy?).

So, yeah, it sounds like Bradshaw could be the beneficiary of his lofty status as a professional athlete, but here's the thing: this is jail. Everything's unfair. As long as the inmates aren't being abused or neglected, I really can't get too worked up about this. Is it ideal? No. But neither is picking up the soap in the shower.

Hat tip: PFT

Mister Mittens Is Not Very Good, Giants Fans Pine for Halcyon Days of Jared Lorenzen

I'm starting to think that maybe it's David Carr's fault. I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt when he flailed with the expansion Houston Texans, or after he was unsuccessful in offense-less Carolina last season, but, you know, maybe the guy just isn't very good.

Granted, Carr, now with the Giants, is learning a new offense and recovering from a sore foot, so perhaps we should cut him some slack. Or not; his nickname is Mr. Mittens, for cripes sake.
"He's getting limited snaps and trying to do everything he can in a limited number of snaps," Tom Coughlin said. "It's going to take a little time, but we've got time, we're in camp." Working with the third team, Carr at times escaped the pocket a bit prematurely. He also threw a pass that was intercepted by safety Sammy Knight.
At an Indy-area Shoney's Jared Lorenzen is wondering where it all went wrong in New York. Whatever happens, though, Carr will always have one supporter, so there's that. In the meantime, however, the Giants will have to decide how far they're willing to go with this Carr-at-QB experiment.

The team drafted Andre Woodson in the sixth round, and there's a chance he could pass Carr on the depth chart before the season opener. It's not likely, particularly since Woodson has plenty to learn, but stranger things have happened. Like wearing gloves to throw a football.

Colts Sign Jared Lorenzen to Back Up Another Manning (Oh, and to Be Big)

Over the last few years, Jared Lorenzen has backed up Eli Manning in New York. Now he has signed on to try to win a job backing up Eli's older brother in Indianapolis.

The Colts have signed Lorenzen (who in that picture looks like Jaws from the James Bond movies) to fight for a third-string quarterback job.

Peyton Manning will miss the preseason after knee surgery, so the depth chart will actually matter for the first time in a decade. Jim Sorgi has been Manning's backup for a while now and should be entrenched in that #2 spot. However, there will be a battle for that third string.

The Colts also brought in Quinn Gray, which may be only to steal some information about the rival Jaguars before the team sends him on his way. The team already has Josh Betts and undrafted free agent Adam Tafralis.

About this time in any blog post about Lorenzen, we get to real off his nicknames making fun of his weight. Enjoy.

Hefty Lefty ... The Pillsbury Throwboy ... Round Mound of Touchdown ... The Tank ... The Abominable Throwman ... He Ate Me ... and J Load.

UPDATE: Both Betts and Tafralis have been let go by the team since Lorenzen and Gray signed. That should mean that Gray and "the Abominable Throwman" will have a free-for-all for that third QB spot. Manning and Sorgi are locked in at 1-2.

Tiki Barber Doesn't Think Offseason Will Be a Distraction for Giants


Leave it to Tiki Barber to be the voice of reason when it comes to the New York Giants. The former Pro Bowl running back-turned-NBC NFL studio analyst makes pretty much the same argument philosopher Lawrence Taylor made when discussing Jason Taylor's football future: when the games start, all the offseason silliness won't matter.

So far this spring, Jeremy Shockey (random fits of anger), Plaxico Burress (wants a new deal), Shaun O'Hara (wants Burress to not be so selfish about wanting a new deal), Ahmad Bradshaw (currently in the can), and Jared Lorenzen (chubby, unemployed) have all made news for non-football-related reasons. Not to worry, though:
"This is the business of the sport," Barber told The Post. "Once football starts it's [all about] football." ...

"I don't think [Burress' contract demands] matter ... As we saw last year with Michael [Strahan, who skipped training camp], people thought it was going to be a big issue and it turned out not to be. I don't think, come Sundays in the fall, it matters too much to players."
Can't disagree with any of that. And Tiki, who questioned Eli Manning's leadership skillz almost a year ago, even had some nice things to say about the handsomest dude in the Manning family:
"He's always been [a leader] who it didn't matter what people thought of him, it only mattered how he could grow," Barber said. "When I was there you could see him growing. People will still doubt him at some point during the year, but he can know in his mind and his heart, 'I've done it already, so I can do it again.' "
See, we can all get along.

Jared Lorenzen, Who Has What Doctors Call a Little Bit of a Weight Problem, Is Unemployed


Commence corpulence humor: the Giants have released heavy-set quarterback Jared Lorenzen. This comes as shocking news, not so much because Lorenzen was ever considered anything more than a Eli Manning's backup during his three-year career, but because New York's front office thought him to be less effective at his job than David Carr. Which is another way of a saying Lorenzen now replaces Jesse Palmer as the worst quarterback on the planet. Sad times, indeed.

The Giants still have four quarterbacks heading into training camp -- Manning, Carr, Anthony Wright and rookie Andre Woodson -- and there's a chance the team goes into the season with just two on the active roster. Wright has been a competent backup for most of his career, but I wouldn't be surprised if David Carr gets the nod because, well, I have no idea (because his nickname is mittens, maybe?).

Woodson could end up on the practice squad if he's slow to pick up the offense, and that's not necessarily a bad thing (Ryan Grant got his start there). Or, maybe the coaches will come to their senses, send Carr packing, and go into the season with Wright and Woodson behind Manning.

As for Lorenzen's future, I'd have to say it looks grim. Daunte Culpepper and Byron Leftwich are still looking for work, and I can't imagine any team would prefer the Hefty Lefty to two former first-round picks. That said, I don't think Lorenzen will be demanding a shot at a starting job, so who knows.

JaMarcus Russell Will Take a Break Before Training Camp, Try Not to Gain 300 Pounds


Earlier this offseason, before the draft, SI.com's Don Banks speculated that Raiders second-year quarterback JaMarcus Russell had swelled to Jared Lorenzen proportions. Banks called it "a concern," even though, you know, he hadn't see Russell since Week 17 of the 2007 season.

As it turned out, Russell arrived to minicamp pretty much the same way he left the team in January. And now that offseason workouts have concluded, Russell plans to take a break before getting back to work when training camp commences July 26. But he cautions, "You can only rest for so much," Russell said with a laugh. "Let people tell it, I might get back up to 300 pounds."

Weight issues aside, Russell is progressing nicely and will be Oakland's starting quarterback come September.
"Right now, he's just really working so hard off the field as well as on the field," Kiffin said. "The way that the team is responding to him as you talk to different players, their feelings about him, they're ready to get behind him and go."
That's good news for an offense that has a chance to put up some points after five seasons of just the opposite. There are still some concerns about the offensive line, and Javon Walker, but Russell, Justin Fargas, Darren McFadden, Zach Miller, and the other, less heralded wideouts are still a capable bunch. And if we're to believe the Raiders could eschew the deep passing game, Walker's loss would be minimized. In theory, anyway.

Philip Rivers' Playoff Effort Was Obviously More Impressive Than Tiger's U.S. Open Win


The Dallas Morning News' Albert Breer is not impressed with you, Tiger Woods. Sure, you had a double stress fracture and a torn ACL, walked more than 21 miles over five days, and gave one of the grittiest performances in major championship history, but, apparently, it wasn't enough. You want tough? How about ... Philip Rivers? Really?

Breer tries to explain:
...[L]et's stop with all the breathless homages. Put the Purple Heart away. While there was some appreciation for it, I don't remember all this slobbering over someone going on in January, after Philip Rivers did something far more impressive. He played in a football game, in freezing conditions, against a 17-0 team through a similar injury.
Well, I did my fair share of slobbering, and I'm not even a Philip Rivers fan. That said, I think it's ridiculous to compare the two. Breer admits to appreciating Tiger's accomplishment, and calls the feat impressive, but adds, "Is [comparing Woods to Philips] even close. No. Way."

He falls into the lazy trap of saying that all Tiger did was "hit golf balls," because "last time I checked, there are plenty of people who aren't in very good physical condition who can endure 18 holes." First, did you really check? I'm guessing no. Second, have you seen Grady Jackson, Sebastian Janikowski or Jared Lorenzen? Am I grossly oversimplifying things? Exactly.

But Breer's readers make my point better than I do:

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