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Marvin Harrison Still Looking for Work

Marvin Harrison has been out of work for six weeks now, and there's no reason to think that'll change anytime soon.

Teams have shown no interest in the 36-year-old, 13-year veteran and Hall of Fame lock. He barely cracked the top-10 in FanHouse's list of top available free agents, which is remarkable when you see such luminaries as Byron Leftwich, Cato June and Dre Bly ahead of him.

Former general manager and teevee talking head Charley Casserly seems unfazed by Harrison's unemployment.

Brandon Jones Gets Surprisingly Big Payday From the 49ers

When the Titans selected receiver Brandon Jones in the third round of the 2005 draft, a lot of people who are paid to offer opinions on talent thought that he had the potential to be a real solid player at the NFL level. In four seasons, however, Jones has been largely average. When your career year came in 2006 and only featured 384 yards and four touchdowns, you're closer to Drew Bennett's career arc than Jerry Rice's.

Apparently, though, Jones is still living off of the hype he got in 2005, because that's the only way I can explain the fact that the 49ers have given him a five-year, $16.5 million deal with $5.4 million guaranteed.

While the deal is hardly an eye-opener in the wake of the gargantuan-money contracts being handed out, it can definitely be called "generous" given Jones' career production. It might also be called "desperation" on the 49ers' part, as they could lose both of 2008's starting receivers -- Isaac Bruce (retirement) and Bryant Johnson (free agency) -- in a relatively thin market.

Needless to say, whoever starts at quarterback for the 49ers this year will have his work cut out for him if Jones is the team's best target in 2009.

Studs and Duds, Conference Championship: Larry. Fitzgerald.


Each week in the NFL, there are players that impress and players that distress. One week a certain quarterback might toss four touchdowns and run around with his finger in the air while the next he's laying on his back, holding his facemask as the other team returns one of his three interceptions for the game-winning score. With that in mind, here's Studs and Duds
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Marvin Harrison Passes Cris Carter on NFL Receptions List, No Chance at Jerry Rice

Indianapolis Colts wide receiver Marvin Harrison has passed former Eagle/Vikings/Dolphin Cris Carter on the NFL's all-time receptions list, catching his 1,102nd career pass today against the Titans.

Harrison is now the NFL's No. 2 all-time receiver, but he has approximately zero chance of catching the all-time leader, former 49er/Raider/Seahawk Jerry Rice. With 1,549 career catches, Rice is still more than 400 catches ahead of the 36-year-old Harrison.

Harrison isn't a good player anymore, and it's possible that this is his last NFL season. The Colts are keeping a lot of their veteran players on the sideline today, and the fact that they left Harrison in the game long after Jim Sorgi had replaced Peyton Manning suggests that they wanted Harrison to pass Carter today because he might not have any more regular-season games in a Colts uniform.

But even if you're extremely optimistic about Harrison's future, and you think he has, say, three more seasons at 60 catches a season left in him, that still leaves him more than 250 short of Rice. That's just how great Jerry Rice was.

Manny Being Choosey: You're on 'Dancing With the Stars'

How hard can it be? Jerry Rice finished second. Emmitt Smith won the thing. Hell, even Warren Sapp didn't embarrass himself.

"I'm going to dance with stars!"

And off you go, on Dancing With the Stars, where you hope to disprove the theory that you're nothing more than an outfield klutz who can hit. And, with Cheryl Burke as your partner, you become the hardest working dancer in show business.

Your toughest competition is the team of Jose Reyes and Julianne Hough, and you know that facing them in the finals is an inevitability. Sure enough, that matchup looms when Reyes comes down with strep throat.

"That's it! I've got this thing won on a technicality!"

But the show's producers decide to choose a ringer to take Reyes' place ...

"Papelbon!"

"That's right Manny, it's me!"

Facing your friend and former teammate isn't easy, but your West Coast Swing is by far the best the show has ever seen, topped off by throwing Burke in the air, climbing the judges table, high-fiving Bruno Tonioli, kissing Carrie Ann Inaba on the cheek, landing in a split, and catching not only Burke, but a rose in your teeth! The crowd is stunned! You score a 30, and the audience goes completely nuts. It's going to take a miracle for Papelbon to pull this out.

But his jig somehow scores a 31 and you're relegated to second place. You're crushed. And Jonathan Papelbon will never let you live it down.

The good news is that you re-sign with the Dodgers in August of '09, hit .672 the rest of the season, and it's obvious that your experience on Dancing With the Stars has even made you a better outfielder with your new-found nimbleness.

The same suitors from 2008 are at your door again in 2009, with more money now that you're a more complete ballplayer at the age of 37. It's good to be Manny Ramirez.

THE END
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(Not sure how you got here? Start Choose Your Own Adventure: Manny Being Choosey in Free Agency from the beginning.)

Terrell Owens Isn't Upset With Tony Romo -- He's Too Busy Clowning 'Sheshawn' Johnson


(photos courtesy of Ronald Martinez, Christian Petersen, Getty Images)

Last night I pointed out that Terrell Owens, according to sources, had concerns with how Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo was utilizing his awesomeness during games. No specifics, but some vague mention of being frustrated with his lack of touches (wait, what?), especially in the deep passing game.

Turns out, T.O. isn't upset with Dallas' offensive game plan, he's bummed that ESPN studio analyst Keyshawn Johnson, who Owens has affectionately taken to calling "Sheshawn", was critical of his play following the Redskins game.

No worries, though; T.O. WILL NOT BE SILENCED ON THIS VERY IMPORTANT MATTER:
Regarding Keyshawn Johnson, whom Owens' referred to as Sheshawn at least three times, he said: "[As the No. 1 overall pick in the 1996 draft] he is the ultimate underachiever on that panel. I am the reason he is in the booth. Everybody is aware when I was brought to Dallas he was the one they let go to get me here."

He said there was one thing he agreed with that [Cris] Carter had to say and that was that Jerry Rice is the best receiver of all time. "But I am second all time behind Jerry Rice," Owens said in accentuating his superiority over Carter and Johnson.
Two things: first, Dwayne Jarrett is the reason Keyshawn is "in the booth"; the Panthers drafted Jarrett in the second round of the 2007 draft, which ultimately led to Johnson's release -- or, asking to be cut, depending on who's telling the story -- and a second career in television.

Rodney Harrison Doesn't Approve of Ricky Williams' Dirty Blocking Techniques


Here's an interesting story; one you might find a little hard to believe. Patriots safety Rodney Harrison, considered by many -- including players, fans and just about everyone who isn't involved with his team -- to be the dirtiest player in the NFL, is complaining because somebody might have played dirty against his team on Sunday. Seriously. This is so crazy, so out there, and so ridiculously unbelievable that it just has to be true. And it is. Honestly, you can't make this stuff up.

From

Antonio Cromartie Would Just Prefer That You Not Throw His Way, Mr. Cutler

The Denver Broncos and Jay Cutler have been playing the role of school yard bully the first two weeks of the NFL season, causing two different defensive backs to have awkward, game changing penalties called against them.

Last week, it was DeAngelo Hall who was beaten soundly, time and time again as Eddie Royal did his best Jerry Rice impersonation late Monday night. Hall kept playing the role of, well, DeAngelo Hall (usually reserved for matchups with Steve Smith though).

And today, as Bill Williamson notes, it's Antonio Cromartie's turn.
Cromartie finally drove Marshall out of bounds. Cromartie kept driving and was called for a personal foul. The Broncos ended up taking a 14-3 lead on a Jay Cutler touchdown pass to Tony Scheffler.

On Denver's next drive, Cromartie was charged with another personal foul after tackling Marshall. Cutler then hit Scheffler for another touchdown as Denver jumped up on San Diego, 21-3.

After each penalty, Cromartie, who was questionable with a hip injury, was jumping up and down and clapping his hands.
Somehow, through all of this -- an additional five yard penalty to keep a Broncos drive alive in the middle of the fourth didn't help either -- the Chargers are only down by one point.

This is, of course, no help to Cromartie, who has allowed Brandon Marshall to pick up a whopping 14 catches for 133 yards and a touchdown. Clearly, when I told you to sit Marshall, I had no idea that Cromartie was playing with one leg and one arm today.

Update + Fantasy: As JJ notes via email, it's probably worth noting that Marshall has a franchise record 17 catches, and counting, already. And yeah, he would be a must start every week forever. I apologize.

Antonio Cromartie Would Just Prefer That You Not Throw His Way, Mr. Cutler

The Denver Broncos and Jay Cutler have been playing the role of school yard bully the first two weeks of the NFL season, causing two different defensive backs to have awkward, game changing penalties called against them.

Last week, it was DeAngelo Hall who was beaten soundly, time and time again as Eddie Royal did his best Jerry Rice impersonation late Monday night. Hall kept playing the role of, well, DeAngelo Hall (usually reserved for matchups with Steve Smith though).

And today, as Bill Williamson notes, it's Antonio Cromartie's turn.
Cromartie finally drove Marshall out of bounds. Cromartie kept driving and was called for a personal foul. The Broncos ended up taking a 14-3 lead on a Jay Cutler touchdown pass to Tony Scheffler.

On Denver's next drive, Cromartie was charged with another personal foul after tackling Marshall. Cutler then hit Scheffler for another touchdown as Denver jumped up on San Diego, 21-3.

After each penalty, Cromartie, who was questionable with a hip injury, was jumping up and down and clapping his hands.
Somehow, through all of this -- an additional five yard penalty to keep a Broncos drive alive in the middle of the fourth didn't help either -- the Chargers are only down by one point.

This is, of course, no help to Cromartie, who has allowed Brandon Marshall to pick up a whopping 14 catches for 133 yards and a touchdown. Clearly, when I told you to sit Marshall, I had no idea that Cromartie was playing with one leg and one arm today.

Update + Fantasy: As JJ notes via email, it's probably worth noting that Marshall has a franchise record 17 catches, and counting, already. And yeah, he would be a must start every week forever. I apologize.

Brett Favre Joins the 'Great Players Who End Career In Weird Jerseys' Team*

*-well, of somewhat recent history.

We all know that Brett Favre will play his first game as a New York Jet this week and the shock of seeing him in a non-Packers jersey will be a bit frightening (as was seeing Jason Taylor in Redskins garb). Still, it isn't like we haven't seen this before from our recently great players.

QB-Brett Favre (Jets)
RB-Emmitt Smith (Cardinals)
RB-Thurman Thomas (Dolphins)
WR-Jerry Rice (Seahawks)
WR-Chris Carter (Dolphins)
WR-Tim Brown (Buccaneers)
OT-Tony Boselli (Texans ... even though he didn't play)
OT-Richmond Webb (Bengals)
OG-Randal McDaniel (Buccaneers)
OG-Bill Fralic (Lions)
C-Mike Webster (Chiefs)

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