FanHouse JessicaBiel

She may not have a home in the MMA world right now, but Gina Carano is still blowing up in the mainstream media world, as she will be ranked inside the top 20 of Maxim's "Hot 100" list for 2009.

The news was passed along to FanHouse from Carano's agent, Matt Walker.

This is the best and the worst time of year for Dugouts. The trade deadline looms and we'll get a chance to cover a lot of teams we don't normally cover. At the same time, the newsmakers of baseball start making news, and most of the time that involves a steady stream of unbelievable stories from the Yankees and the Red Sox. I want to do more Pirates Dugouts, but nobody in Pittsburgh just had their marriage broken up by a random assemblance of pop musicians. Nobody from the Pirates ran up a wall and high-fived a guy.

We've been sitting on this for a few days, waiting for the logical "oh THIS is what really happened" to come along. It just... isn't coming along. So today we attempt to handle this from an educated, even-handed perspective.

Today's Dugout, which should've just been about the Royals again, is after the jump.

I was listening to The Adam Carolla Show this morning and they had a guest on from a gossip website called L.A. Rag Mag. Far be it from me to judge the credibility of the site; all I know is that Carolla had them on, so they must be somewhat legit (or entertaining at the least). Well, their latest report certainly has a strong charge -- that Derek Jeter gave Jessica Alba herpes:

Jessica Alba (before she was Jessica Alba) used to date Derek Jeter, the serial celebrity dater, who plays for the NY Yankees. Well, our source worked for Cash Warren, her ex, and had to refill her Valtrex prescription for her on a regular basis! Guess who she got it from...that's right...dirty Derek Jeter.

You know what this means don't YOU?!! All of his other famous relationships could have contracted the STD TOO! Derek's most famous sexual conquest include Mariah Carey, Jessica Alba, Vanessa Minnillo and most recently Jessica Biel. Which means JT could have it AAAHHH!!

Perhaps this is the wrong attitude, but I've always been of the accepting mindset for STDs -- at least it means you're getting some, right? And by the way, if this is at all true, anything you can get from having relationships with Mariah Carey, Jessica Biel, and Jessica Alba, I'm all for. Sign me up.
Sorry, No Photos

Just when I thought I couldn't possibly contain another ounce of love in my body for Jessica Biel -- and, folks, I've TiVo'ed that bit where she bends over in the commercial for I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry so much, it's permanently burnt into my TV screen -- I read this bit at Boston Dirt Dogs.

Apparently Jessica, a former Derek Jeter squeeze, once showed up in the House That Ruth Built wearing Red Sox gear, a story she recounted on Regis And Kelly:

"I didn't really understand the rivalry until I went to a game [at Yankee Stadium]...I went to Tufts so... and my friend told me I had to wear Red Sox gear... It was one of the best New York experiences of my life [being a Red Sox fan in Yankee Stadium] and I loved it. I had a hat, I had a Red Sox t-shirt, they knew who I was. It was pretty interesting."

What kind of man am I that the thought of Jessica Biel wearing a Red Sox jersey is actually more arousing than the thought of Jessica Biel wearing nothing. No kind of man at all, really.

I'm with Dirt Dogs -- somebody get this woman a nomination for President of Red Sox Nation!