FanHouse KidneyStones

As I told you about the other day, Angels pitcher Joe Saunders has been having a rough go of things lately. The poor guy has had to miss nearly a full week of action thanks to complications from a kidney stone. Those complications being pain. Horrible, horrible pain.

Well if you were in downtown Seattle on Wednesday morning, you probably heard screams emanating from a hotel room. A man was yelling "Oh dear god just kill me now! The pain! The pain!" That was Joe Saunders, as he finally passed his kidney stone.

The kidney stone that caused Joe Saunders so much pain for five days passed Wednesday morning, the ordeal leaving the left-hander eight pounds lighter but extremely relieved.

"It gives you an appreciation for the every-day things in life," Saunders said, "like being able to eat like a human being and being able to function normally."

Really? It was that bad?

"It felt like someone stabbed me in the back, punched me in the gut and kicked me in the groin, all at the same time," Saunders said. "It was like someone stuck a knife in the right side of my lower back. It was like a bad cramp that wouldn't go away."

That's funny, I had a relationship with a girl once that felt exactly the same way. Of course, that was because she was stabbing me in the back, punching me in the gut, and kicking me in the groin constantly. What a spark plug she was.

I'm not afraid of a lot of things, but I do have my fears. Right now my biggest fear in life is seeing Ozzie Guillen summoning a pitcher from his bullpen with anything less than a ten run lead. Still, one thing I've never had to deal with but I've always feared is the idea of getting a kidney stone. Going off of stories I've heard from people who have had them, and just the general idea that a little pebble could rip through my ... yeah, I don't even want to type it because it already hurts.

Which is why I'm happy I'm not Angels starter Joe Saunders at the moment. The Angels left-hander, who leads the team in wins with 16, is going to miss his next scheduled start thanks to kidney stones.

Saunders said a kidney stone was expected to cause him pain for 48 hours. He added that the stone could dissipate or pass through his system by Monday morning.

"It has been making my back not feel very good," Saunders said. "I'm taking pain pills for my back, and it feels better."

You better hope that thing dissipates before passing through your system, because if you think your back hurts right now, wait until that bad boy comes out. You'll likely end up begging for somebody to show mercy and just kill you right there.