FanHouse Madonna

It's been a pretty horrible year for Alex Rodriguez, but after seeing the way he's handled himself in light of the steroid scandal and reading Selena Roberts' book, I kind of get the impression that he couldn't care less. According to Roberts in her book, Rodriguez is more focused these days on being a celebrity than a baseball player, and a lot of his actions back this up. There was that whole leaving his wife for Madonna thing, for example.

There was also a part of the book that talked about the first time A-Rod met Kate Hudson at the re-opening of the Fontainebleau hotel in Miami last November. Roberts said that Hudson flirted with A-Rod pretty constantly and that he seemed to like it, and now apparently the two of them are spending their time making out with each other in New York restaurants.

What a crazy week. I'd say it was a news week on steroids, but that would just prompt the week to blame everything on its doctor who prescribed the drugs.

From Manny Ramirez's departure to A-Rod's return, the news spun like a roulette wheel. That made it just like most weeks in this 24-7 news era, which is why we here at FanHouse decided a Week in Review column was needed.

Left on Base is MLB FanHouse's link dump.

* Boston's two-year offer to Jason Varitek comes with a deadline -- he has until the end of the week before the Red Sox take the deal off the table.

* The Rangers move into the lead for Ben Sheets, which pleases Kevin Millwood: "I think it would be great for us if he's on our team," Millwood said. "I don't know what's going on with that, but he'll make us a better team."

* All the fake sports-themed Lego men you've ever wanted.

Of course, that's just one of the revelations that the two newly-elected members of baseball's Hall of Fame both admitted to Tuesday night while doing the Top 10 list on the Late Show with David Letterman. I have no idea how Alex Rodriguez is going to react when he hears the news, but, on the bright side, it seems as though sleeping with Madonna does improve your Hall of Fame resume. Jose Canseco has hope! (Hat tip to SPORTSbyBROOKS)

In case you weren't already aware, you only have 20 shopping days left until Christmas, so if you haven't gotten your shopping/Wal-Mart killing spree started yet, you should probably get started on that already. Of course, some people are really hard to shop for which is where gift cards come in handy, but there are some people in your life where gift cards are just too impersonal.

I remember when I was a kid it was easy. I would just buy my mom some crappy piece of jewelry they sold at Santa's Workshop day at school, and I would get my dad some underwear. Well these days it's a bit tougher, and it's too bad my old man isn't a Yankees or a Red Sox fan because if he was I'd be able to keep the underwear tradition alive.

Got a Yankees fan on your Christmas list? Or maybe a Red Sox groupie you want to aggravate? Well, why just buy them an A-Rod shirt when you can get Alex Rodriguez's authentic game-used underwear????

Now there's a gift that keeps on giving!

Phil Castinetti of SportsWorld in Saugus has gotten his mitts on some All-Star undies - A-Rod's, Kevin Youkilis' and Josh Beckett's - and he's selling them on eBay starting today.

And in case you were wondering -- and I know you were -- they are in fact game used. As for how Phil got his hands on them, he's not saying and frankly I'm not sure I want to know. The bidding starts at $9.99, and though Castinetti said he'd put them up for auction today, as of this very moment there are no listings. I guess he wants to build suspense.

Alex Rodriguez is really becoming a pariah, of sorts, for the New York media. Thanksgiving hasn't even happened yet, and he's already being dragged through the mud about his holiday plans. You see, he's allegedly going to spend the break with Madonna instead of his children.

Instead of ushering in the holidays in Miami with his children, Natasha, 4, and Ella, 1 - A-Rod, 33, is hosting a dinner at his Manhattan apartment for Madonna, 50, and her kids, Lourdes, Rocco, and David, and manager Guy Oseary.

If that was really true, I'd have to agree it's a pretty selfish and brutal thing to do to your kids. I mean, Thanksgiving is a holiday where families generally spend time together -- unlike the night before.

Reports are surfacing, however, that contradict the above report from the New York Post. According to Us Magazine, the Post is completely wrong:

"He's going to be with Cynthia and her entire family for Thanksgiving, and this has been planned for months," the insider adds. "It's quite a big celebration."

"They have a large family get together every year," the source tells Us. "It was always his intention to go to the family get together with her family, and it includes a whole array of relatives."

It couldn't be going any better. In just four months you've become a Yankee legend. A homer off Jonathan Papelbon to win your first game back at Fenway Park, two three-homer games at the new Yankee Stadium, and a .415 batting average have you being cheered with a lustiness that makes Derek Jeter green with envy.

Every corner of the city thrills to your exploits. When you pull out your cell phone to make a call during a pitching change, no one makes a fuss. In fact, Verizon has given you $20 million to be their new spokesman. Your jerseys are flying off the shelves and hospitals are full of kids named Manny Ramirez ______. You could run for Mayor and beat Bloomberg.

Life is so good that you go out to Nobu to celebrate with some friends after slugging a homer and driving in five to beat the Orioles in early August. You're enjoying the sushi and sipping some sake when you feel a tap on your shoulder. You turn to see Madonna smiling at you.

"I just wanted to say hello. And wanted to tell you how much I love your dreadlocks, they're so spiritual."

You're smitten instantly. You spend the rest of the night telling her everything about yourself and she explains Kabbalah theories to you well into the next morning. The next few weeks are repeats, long nights spent in clandestine meetings full of romance, until the fateful day a photographer catches the two of you leaving your apartment together.

The photo is everywhere you look, impossible for Alex Rodriguez to miss. You walk into the clubhouse later that day to learn the news that he's disappeared. He was last seen running shirtless through Central Park, tears streaming down his face, holding a copy of the photo.

The Yankees fall apart without his bat to protect you in the lineup. A long losing streak costs Joe Girardi his job, people blame you for everything, and the Red Sox run away with the division. And you couldn't care a whit. You've found that true love is all you need.

THE END.

(Not sure how you got here? Start Choose Your Own Adventure: Manny Being Choosey in Free Agency from the beginning.)

The Alex Rodriguez and Madonna Love Shack. It's very [reportedly] real and very [reportedly] poorly named. But it is there. And people are talking about it. Because, well, clearly there's not enough other good things to talk about re: baseball right now.

[...]new reports say they have been enjoying clandestine meetings since July 2007 at a New York apartment rented by the sports star.

Fox News online columnist Roger Friedman claims A-Rod "had sub-let a 'secret love shack' in the Time Warner Centre last summer".

He added: "I confirmed that Madonna was a frequent guest to the building, which was a very different address from the apartment A-Rod shared with his now ex-wife."

The property - just a few blocks away from the 4 Minutes star's base in the city - is apparently still occupied by Alex.

Meanwhile, Madonna, 50 and Alex, 33, are reportedly planning a trip to Malawi together when her 'Sticky and Sweet' world tour comes to an end.

Rowwwr. How spicy all around. Is there a way we can tie in a Beach Boys song for the Malawi trip this time? Because that would be slightly more awesome than a B-52's reference.

It would also be slightly less awesome than hearing about A-Rod and Madonna during what is headed towards a awesomely put together yet under-watched World Series matchup. Bright side: at least we aren't hearing about this while the Yankees are actually playing.

Via Final Score

There's a large, gaping hole of symbolism between a fun-to-report total rumor and a legitimately important celebrity relationship story. And that hole can be filled when two people as famous as Alex Rodriguez and Madonna are seen eating dinner together. (Or when Madonna allegedly "brainwashes" A-Rod, but that's beside the point.)

Which is what the New York Post is reporting, via the always fun "sources."

REPS for Madonna and Alex Rodriguez deny the two dined together at Dos Caminos on Third Avenue the other night. But sources insist the Yankee star broke bread with Madge and two male friends. "Madonna entered through the front door half an hour after A-Rod arrived and had her security guards check the exits before she sat down at a quiet corner table," said one source. Madonna had the men laughing with her stories. When the meal was over, they left by separate exits.

I don't feel "good" about reporting this -- clearly it has nothing to do with the actual playoffs going on. However, A-Rod and Madonna are two enormously famous celebrities in their respective corners of the world, so it's going to be news to lots of people when they come together.

Perhaps neither one is really that great in terms of legitimate non-pop culture likability (I can only imagine the fake-accent-spewing children they would crank out), but they are both immensely talented and popular. So if they start dating, I'm gonna tell you about it. (Oh yeah, it might be important to note that their reps are totally denying all of this.)

Also, how awful would C-Rod feel if Alex took the Yankees to a title the year after they locked up that divorce? I think it would be fairly awkward.

I know how you FanHouse readers must feel right now, you're almost through your work day and you haven't gotten your latest A-Rod/Madonna update. It's frustrating, I know, as you're not quite sure how you're supposed to get through the day without hearing the latest crazy rumors.


Well, I'm sure you've heard the adage be careful what you wish for, because we do have an update for you. There was only one more step this story could have taken that could trump all the insanity that's already happened, and now it's here. Yep, that's right, apparently there's a sex tape.

A sleazy cameraman is trying to flog a tape he alleges shows the singer romping with US baseball hunk Alex Rodriguez.

He is demanding a fortune for the footage he claims was shot with a hidden camera in an apartment allegedly used by the pair for secret afternoon trysts.

Last night Madonna's lawyers said they were "aware" of the lensman's claims but were not commenting.