FanHouse NookLogan

Another day, another huge name being suspended by Major League Baseball. Today's martyr? Tampa Bay Devil Rays pitching prospect, James Houser.

LHP James Houser, a Sarasota native who was the Rays' second-round pick in 2003, was suspended 50 games on Saturday for "testing positive for a performance-enhancing substance,'' according to MLB.

Good Lord, first it was Neifi Perez, and now James Houser? Who will the children of America turn to for guidance and support? The next thing you know Nook Logan will get suspended, and nobody will watch baseball anymore.

Houser was pitching for the Devil Rays Double-A affiliate, the Montgomery Biscuits. I know you don't really care, but I just love the fact that there's a baseball team somewhere named the Biscuits. I would be proud to wear that uniform. I'd be walking down the street and some old man would elbow his grandson in the shoulder and tell him, "You see that man? That's Tom Fornelli, and he plays for the Montgomery Biscuits." Oohs and aahs would ensue.

Wait, where was I? Oh yeah, Houser. What I want to know is why there are so many Devil Rays players being suspended for performance enhancing drugs. If you're keeping count, and really who isn't, Houser is the fifth Devil Ray to be suspended in the last three years. There was Juan Salas earlier this season, Alex Sanchez right before the 2005 season. Josh Hamilton was suspended in 2004, but that was for nose candy, not steroids. And of course there was Julio Lugo.

Considering all the players in the organization juicing, shouldn't the Devil Rays be a lot better than 46-75? Maybe steroids are performance decreasing, and we've all gotten our panties in a bunch for nothing.

At about this point, I would say that Ryan Langerhans has a complex. For the second time in a week, Langerhans was traded ... this time, back to the National League East with the Washington Nationals.

Outfielder Ryan Langerhans was traded Wednesday night for the second time in a week, going from the Oakland Athletics to the Washington Nationals for outfielder Chris Snelling. Langerhans, obtained Sunday from Atlanta , went 0-for-4 with two strikeouts and a walk against Boston in two games for Oakland. He started both games in center field and misplayed a liner for an error that led to a run in the Red Sox 6-4 win Wednesday. He was 3-for-44 with the Braves and came to the Athletics after snapping an 0-for-29 slump on Sunday.

Wow, you have one slump, you make one error, and all of a sudden you get traded twice in a week. So much for the theory that mistakes are why they put erasers on pencils.

Good trade for the Nationals considering that with Nook Logan and Alex Escobar on the DL, the Nationals depth chart at this moment has Ryan Church as the starting center fielder ... and the starting left fielder. Ryan Church is good, but that's a lot of ground to cover.

It's going to be a long year for the Washington Nationals. They're off to an 0-2 start already, and really, who knows if they'll get a win this month. They're just that bad.

How bad are they?

Well during the offseason the Detroit Tigers sent Nook Logan (pictured to the right warding off evil spirits) to the Nationals for the infamous "players to be named." The way these deals work is that the Tigers would receive a list of players of several minor leaguers in the Nationals system. They then get to go through the names and pick anyone that they want.

Well, the Tigers went through that list, and after looking long and hard they made their decision. They decided just to take $75,000 in cash from the Nationals rather than subject themselves to a Nats minor leaguer. When asked about the Nationals and their list of players, Tigers GM Dave Dombrowski laughed so hard he cried.

"Oh my God! They suck so freaking bad! I think I saw Harmon Killebrew's name on there."**

Logan is the Nationals starting center fielder, and so far this season he's 1-for-1 and has already earned himself a trip to the disabled list. Go, Nats!

**Not an actual statement, though I'm sure he thought it.

Previously at the Fanhouse:

Can The Washington Nationals Be Historically Bad?

No, I'm not going to completely write off the Nationals after two games.

Five? Ten? Maybe. Not two ... that would just be silly.

But not only is the Nationals' starting rotation threatening to mathematically eliminate them by June (Shawn Hill was barely better than John Patterson in a 9-3 loss to the Marlins tonight), but at this rate they may not have enough to field a team by July. First, Cristian Guzman and Nook Logan get hurt on Opening Day (both were placed on the disabled list), but Ronnie Belliard came perilously close to joining them. You wouldn't believe how:

He was in the wrong place at the wrong time, standing in foul territory near the batting cage. Belliard never saw the wayward, 100-foot throw from rookie catcher Jesus Flores that was intended for Brian Schneider. It was several feet off the mark and caught Belliard flush on the left temple He immediately fell to the ground. Manager Manny Acta yelled out, "Trainer! Trainer!" and all eyes turned toward Belliard, fearing something serious had happened. Fortunately, he was all right. Woozy, but all right.

Good news for a team that could use all the good news it could get. But back to the starting pitching, it's one thing to give up thousands of hits to Miguel Cabrera (who's hitting .714) and Josh Willingham (three hits on Tuesday), but when the pitcher gets a couple of hits and an RBI, there's problems. Scott Olsen got the job done with the bat, and pitched relatively well despite five walks, taking a shutout into the sixth.

Those wondering why most experts picked the Nationals to lose over 100 games this season can wonder no more, as starting pitching was indeed the achillies heel for the Nats during their opener. John Patterson, (the ace by default), exited this game with a healthy ERA of 14.73 as the Nats dropped game one to the Marlins 9-2.

Miguel Cabrera, who spent the last days of spring training hitting baseballs to Mars during batting practice, hit one to Jupiter (the planet, not the Marlins spring facility) off of Patterson in the fourth. Cabrera proved that he indeed was ready for the season to start with three hits and four RBI's. Hanley Ramirez made the Marlins happy (along with fantasy owners like myself) with four hits and two stolen bases.

More importantly it was the first major league victory for skipper Fredi Gonzalez, who celebrated with champagne after the game. Nationals counterpart Manny Acta will have to wait for his celebratory champagne ... right now, he'd settle for some ice packs.

Not only is Acta 0-1, but his starter, John Patterson, didn't make it out of the fourth inning, and two position players - a quarter of the starting lineup - left with injuries before the end of the fifth: shortstop Cristian Guzman (left hamstring) and center fielder Nook Logan (left foot).

"That," Gonzalez said, "is freaky."

Acta's take: "It's not frustrating, it's just weird. We went the whole spring training and were pretty much healthy coming out of Florida, and then two guys go down."

Just in time too. I know the Nationals season is supposed to be bad, but that bad? That fast? Yikes!

Previously on The Fanhouse:
Miguel Cabrera is Ready for the Season to Start
How Bad can it Get for the Nationals?