FanHouse RayLewis

I think I'd be less appalled if Joe Flacco and Ray Lewis actually got married. Instead, we're treated to some hardcore Ravens fans celebrating their nuptials by donning the jerseys of their favorite players and forcing the wedding party to do the same.

And no homage to the unexceptional would be complete without the groom busting out the Ray-Ray Dance. (He forgot to rub grass all over himself! Bogus!)

Video madness after the jump.

The National Football League has fined Baltimore Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis $25,000 for a hit on Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco on Sunday, ignoring Ochocinco's request that NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell spare Lewis a fine.

Chad Ochocinco appears to have emerged from his funk, the one that consumed him for most of 2007 and part of last season, too. Now he's back to his affable, fun-loving ways, which should serve as a nice distraction when the Bengals begin their inevitable implosion.

That descent into mediocrity could start Sunday when Cincy faces Baltimore in a battle for first place in the AFC North. And in preparation for the get-together Mr. Ochocinco, as he's known to do, has commenced with the jibber jabber.

On a Wednesday conference call Chad told reporters what he had in store for the Ravens.

This is a couple days old but, really, there's always room for more Tom Brady news. You're welcome.

Sunday night Rodney Harrison, former Patriots cheap-shot expert turned NBC studio analyst, had some advice for Brady following Baltimore-New England game: "... Tom Brady, if you're listening, take off the skirt and put on some slacks -- toughen up." The comments were in reference to this play, one that left Ray Lewis very sad.

Maybe Rex Ryan's midweek gum-flapping had nothing to do with the Monday night Jets-Ravens game. Or maybe it did. Either way, rookie quarterback Mark Sanchez found out two plays into his first NFL start that he wasn't facing the University of Washington.

On his first pass attempt, Sanchez threw a pick-six to defensive tackle Haloti Ngata, but not before getting knocked silly by linebacker Ray Lewis. And on his second pass attempt, Sanchez would have thrown another pick-six had Lewis not dropped it.

Before proclaiming that Sanchez isn't yet ready for the New York City spotlight or the rigors of life as an NFL starting quarterback, it's probably worth repeating this tweet from Football Outsiders: "Basing your QB decision on preseason play is like deciding on a NASCAR career because you won at go-karts."

The NFL season is less than five weeks away, and today FanHouse is at Ravens training camp -- Stop 2 and mile 270 of Dan Graziano's five-camp, 1,100-mile road trip.

WESTMINSTER, Md. -- Pressure? Nerves? Just because Tavares Gooden is expected to take over free-agent defector Bart Scott's spot at Ravens inside linebacker next to Ray Lewis? No way, says Gooden. Running with the first team in practice isn't about pressure or nerves. It's about great big holes to run through.

"You hear noises that make you think you're watching an army movie -- Haloti Ngata crashing into guys and stuff like that," Gooden said Sunday after the Ravens wrapped up their afternoon practice at McDaniel College. "And then you've got those holes and those openings, and you just fill them as a linebacker. I think that's the biggest part of being with the 'ones.' Everybody knows their assignments, and all you have to do is play off that D-line."

It happens every year at training camp, yet every year seems worse than the ones that preceded it: players get injured, sometimes seriously, and an offseason worth of plans suddenly become meaningless.

The Eagles will be without middle linebacker Stewart Bradley for the season, and things aren't looking good for Falcons wide receiver Harry Douglas (and this is while the club tries to negotiate an extension with Roddy White).

And on Sunday, the Ravens' No. 2 wideout, Mark Clayton, strained a hamstring that will keep him out 2-3 preseason games. Compared to Bradley or Douglas, that's good news, but Baltimore also doesn't have much depth at receiver. More than that, quarterback Joe Flacco is just in his second season. Spreading the offensive burden seems like the best strategy to build on the success he had last year, but that becomes problematic if Flacco doesn't have anybody to throw to. Or maybe it doesn't.

Yesterday, the Ravens re-signed Terrell Suggs for six more years, and it only cost them $38 million in guaranteed dough. He'll pull in $33 million in bonuses the next two seasons, and that makes him the league's highest-paid defensive player and second overall, behind just Peyton Manning.

This must be very disconcerting for Steelers linebacker James Harrison, the 2008 Defensive Player of the Year, who got a new contract earlier this offseason (worth $18 million less in guarantees than Suggs). Because football players -- especially the unpredictable, maniacal types -- draw most of their motivation from being disrespected. Or something.

Let's be honest, there are few things more entertaining in sports than when an athlete is absolutely despised by a city. And I don't mean despised in the Michael Jordan-tears-out-Cleveland's-heart-with-a-wooden-spoon level hate. That's rooted in Jordan's superhuman play on the field.

I mean on a level like LenDale White stomping on the Terrible Towel and refusing to apologize -- where the entire city is outraged at one particular player.