FanHouse Terrell Owens

With Fantasy Football season ready to kick in high gear, FanHouse is here to preview each and every team -- one per day until we've done them all.

Meet The ...
City/team so desperate for attention they signed Terrell Owens to a one-year deal! Seriously, it could pan out well -- but we all know that Roger Goodell is in the middle of not-so-quietly handing this franchise to Canada (hello publishing date irony!).

Of course, a big season from the Bills could do some good in staving off that run for the border, but that will require a number of very good things to happen: Marshawn Lynch needs to return from suspension with a vengeance, Fred Jackson needs to be happy, Owens needs to be really happy, Trent Edwards needs to be good and, well, yeah, there are lots of ifs. But there's also a lot of value on this team for fantasy owners that might slip under the radar.

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It seems like everybody has a distinct memory of what Michael Jackson meant to them, particularly those of us in our 30s, who grew up listening to him. For me, it was convincing my parents to buy the "Thriller" album (33 RPMs!), and listening to it for hours at a time on our sweet Curtis Mathes all-in-one home entertainment system that looked a lot like this.

For a college buddy of mine (who shall remain nameless to spare him the shame of what I'm about to write) it was probably attending breakdancing classes as a chubby preteen while sporting one sparkly glove and a backpack stuffed with his Cabbage Patch Kid. (Amazingly, he now holds down a full-time job and spent very little time in therapy.)

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And for Terrell Owens, the enigmatic NFL wideout currently with the Bills, it was a Michael Jackson dance contest. Via BuffaloBills.com's Chris Brown:

Terrell Owens said last week the Dallas Cowboys got rid of him to make him a scapegoat for Tony Romo's failure to become a leader. But when Romo was asked this week to respond to Owens' comments, he declined to get into a war of words with his highly volatile ex-teammate.

At the end of his youth football camp last week in Dallas, Bills wide receiver Terrell Owens said he was inspired by a 16-year-old football player named Corey Borner.

Last Thursday, Owens, along with Bills teammate Donte Whitner, visited Borner at the Baylor Institute for Rehabilitation. Borner suffered a severe spinal cord injury during spring practice on May 6 while playing for DeSoto (Texas) High School.

After surgery to prevent further damage, he is currently recovering at the rehab center. Borner can move his arms but not his legs, but hopes to eventually.

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While no Kurt Warner, I consider myself to be a morally upstanding citizen. I give up my seat on the subway to the elderly (as well as shoot an annoyed look to the teenagers who do not), refrain from unnecessarily yelling fire in a crowded movie theater, and always take the side that steroid users like Barry Bonds, Alex Rodriguez and Sammy Sosa have no place in the Hall of Fame. When it comes to fantasy football though, my competitive nature tends to go into overdrive.

In more occasions than I would like to admit I become as desperate as Nick Nolte in the first act of Blue Chips, kick the soapbox to the curve and go all out signing every player with character issues that I can find to help me win. To prevent future me from some deep soul-searching sessions, I have traversed the murky terrain of morally dubious players and separated the individuals that I am allowing myself to own this season from those that will be off-limits.

At this time last year Chris Johnson was a rookie who was keeping his head down and hoping to just get noticed for his speed on the field.

But with a 1,228-yard rushing season under his belt, Johnson is ready to make a name for himself, as he showed when he announced he has a new nickname -- "Every Coach's Dream."

On Tuesday, Brinson posted the video of Polish model Joanna Krupa clowning Terrell Owens on Superstars, the original reality show (now you know who to blame).

Something about T.O. hurting the team's chance to win. It was all very made-for-teevee in that it was candid, awkward, and forced. Good times.

Anyway, a day later, Owens issued a blanket apology for, well, everything he has done, or might do in the future. The apology was tongue-in-cheek and funny. And, for me, that's what differentiates T.O. from, say, Chad Ochocinco. He'll wreck your team, sure, but he also has the self-awareness to know he's doing it, and will even make jokes about it in the process. Don't get me wrong: I don't want him on my team, but the sideshow is wholly enjoyable from afar.

(Video after the jump.)

Leadership is a funny thing, Tony Romo said a few weeks ago.

When you're winning football games nobody says anything about it. When you're losing, everybody talks about the lack of it.

Thursday afternoon, Terrell Owens made note of the lack of leadership in his last season with the Cowboys -- a year that ended with a 9-7 record and no playoff berth. Notably, Owens singled out Romo, his quarterback of the last three seasons for not being a leader.

It's funny, but Owens never questioned Romo's leadership abilities before. But now, Owens is of the belief that the quarterback had something to do with him getting released by the Cowboys.

Terrell Owens has made many a teammate unhappy in his time as a professional athlete. (49ers, Eagles, Cowboys. Oh my.) But it's never his fault! Of course, when he appears on the reality show (reality, right?) known as "Superstars" and still manages to cheese off Polish model Joanna Krupa ... well, maybe it's time we see a pattern, no? Enjoy that, city of Buffalo. Should be a fun season.

Video is after the jump. (Punte's got a NSFW version over at With Leather.)

When a video goes "viral" it circulates wildly around the internet. And today's special is DJ Steve Porter's remix of a slew of different sports rants. Via Kissing Suzy Kolber, it basically hinges on Allen Iverson's "Practice" rant while mixing in Jim Mora's "Playoffs!" freak, slicing some Terrell Owens into the fold and even including a little Mike Gundy and Joe Namath, although not together. It's freaking beautiful, too, people. Holy meme.