Losing to your most hated rival is tough, very tough. Especially in college football where you have to spend the next 364 days marinating in the bitter stew of your defeat. The only thing worse than losing to your rival is losing to your rival in consecutive years. Three years in a row is worse than that and so on and so forth. Worst of all? When your bitter rival does something so debilitating that you don't even know how to respond.
Christmas decorations begin in late August, and now the ClayNation Hypesman Watch (CHW) is here in the first week of May. It's part of a new term, I just coined: Heisman Creep. (And it has nothing to do with Maurice Clarett). We're going to try something radical here, every other week or so we'll drop in and give you a top 10 list for Heisman candidates. Even though most of them are finishing their spring finals right about now. The goal is to ridicule the Heisman obsession, keep us entertained, and write about the Heisman in a way no one else is.
And, plainly, it's never too early to start debating the most over-hyped award this side of a kindergarten valedictorian.
It's barely spring here in the Midwest but spring football is well under way, and there's abundant intrigue in the Big Ten conference. Coming off what seems like the 46th consecutive disappointing bowl season, including a Rose Bowl where Penn State's Daryll Clark (right) did his best but the Nittany Lions still couldn't beat Southern Cal, nobody will be expecting much from the conference or its teams when fall rolls around. Somebody has to win it, however, and now is when the jockeying for position really begins.
Hey, it's always football season at FanHouse. Welcome to "Greetings From Flyover Country," a new weekly feature that will keep you up to date on Big Ten, Big 12, and MAC football. We'll also cover any Midwestern stories which have national repercussions, along with rounding up the week's arrests and suspensions.
We start this week with a decision bound to have people from San Ysidro to Bangor scratching their heads. Please give a moment's thought to the worst aspect of the last postseason. While the Big 12 championship was settled on the field, the Big 12 South championship wasn't. Instead, the conference gave the division title to Oklahoma, because they use the BCS rankings as a tiebreaker.
Wednesday is a huge day for countless teenage high school football prodigies. It's the first day they can ink a National Letter of Intent to the college of their choice. For many of these kids, this represents the first big decision they've had to make.
Scores of you will be checking in throughout the day to see what talent your favorite football program is bringing in. We'll be around all day giving you the latest information. Many top prospects haven't made their mind up yet. Some may have a last-second change of heart and throw us all a curveball. Others will surprise no one when they sign on the dotted line. One thing is certain: It will all receive much more hype than it's really worth.
Okay, that headline is not exactly news. It's up there with "points good to win foot-ball" as far as things you already know. But perhaps the news here is the vast extent to which Ohio State's hopes rest on the (enormous, strapping, terrifying) shoulders of Terrelle Pryor.
You see, Ohio State backup quarterbacks Rob Schoenhoft and Antonio Henton transferred last year, leaving Pryor, senior Todd Boeckman, and 26-year-old ex-minor-league-baseball-player and walk-on Joe Bauserman the only quarterbacks on the roster. Boeckman is now out of eligibility.
In the first installment of the end-of-season report card on the Big Ten, we looked at the schools in the first half of the alphabet. Know what letter is in the first half of the alphabet? That's right. F. But then, all the other grade letters are in the first half of the alphabet too.
Even though it wasn't a great year overall for the conference, there were plenty of bright points and hopeful signs and "wait until next year" moments which should have Big Ten fans excited for next season. Either that, or we'll all look like Charlie Brown did five seconds after Lucy teed up the football. But I digress. Let's take a look at the teams in the second drawer of the Big Ten file cabinet, shall we?
And it ain't pretty. Perhaps sensing an opening to take shots at the Notre Dame coach after the new athletic director had to issue something resembling a vote of confidence this week and Jason Whitlock took to calling him college football's "Pear Bryant", the Tribune fired off several more volleys at the ego of the Irish coach.
When [Jeannette PA football coach Ray] Reitz told Weis that [recruit Terrelle] Pryor might attend a USC quarterbacks camp, he remembers Weis replying: "Why send him there? If he's with me for one day he'll be good, two days he'll be great and three days he'll be incredible."
Later, unprompted, Weis asked the Jeannette coaches if they wanted to take a picture of his Super Bowl ring.
What, no request to kiss the ring as well? Ask Pitt what it thinks about Jimmy Clausen after two years with Weis.
RIGHT: Brian Hartline, the harbinger of Spartan doom.
Look, I tried to warn you. I told you last week that Michigan State just didn't have enough defense to contain the Buckeyes. The only thing that shocked me about the outcome of that game was how easy it was for Ohio State. Clearly, I failed to consider the possibility that ur-conservative Jim Tressel might start letting Terrelle Pryor throw deep. Clearly, neither did Mark Dantonio, who probably went into his office after the game and knocked all the stuff off his shelves.
Tressel did it the way you're supposed to do it. He used the running abilities of Pryor and Beanie Wells as bait. Once the Spartans were forced to stick close to the line of scrimmage lest they give up another 20-yard (or more) run, Pryor hit Brian Hartline on a 56 yard pass. That marked the official beginning of the "we don't know what to do next" phase for Sparty. Enter fumbles and interceptions; exit, Sparty's hopes of being a dark horse.
The Spartans get to recoup against a doddering Michigan team which once again wasted a good half of football in order to become the latest thing stuck to the bottom of Joe Paterno's shoe. The Buckeyes move on, too, for their second Clash of the Titans remake of the season.
ABOVE: Wisconsin's Jonathan Casillas couldn't catch the above quarterback, who is not John Elway. Perhaps if Casillas had a motorized vehicle of some sort ...
Okay, I know it's still quite early in the season, but I think we've seen the Horrible Pants-Blasting Loss of the Year. Not to take anything away from the Wolverines, but when you look at the box score from last Saturday's Wisconsin/Michigan game, you can't help but come away thinking, "How on Earth did the Badgers lose that game?" Up 19-0 at halftime against a team that had only scored 19 points once in three games, with a clock-gobbling running game and a usually stifling defense ... and they gacked.
Sure, there are some good reasons why they lost. Allan Evridge is an inexperienced quarterback. Then again, he's more experienced than Steven Threet, who looked like John freakin' Elway in the fourth quarter. (Okay, he looked like Elway would have looked if Elway had been able to run. I haven't forgotten all the O.J. Simpson jokes, you know.) Again, you have to give Michigan credit for doing what it took to win that game ... but how did Wisconsin lose it? You can only reach one conclusion: Pants-blast.
Other teams whose lower body laundry you wouldn't have wanted to do last week: Indiana, Iowa, and Purdue, who I think became the first team ever to not intercept Jimmy Clausen. How will these teams rebound this week? Hint: like a dead cat.
Losing to your most hated rival is tough, very tough. Especially in college football where you have to spend the next 364 days marinating in the bitter stew of your defeat. The only thing worse than losing to your rival is losing to your rival in consecutive years. Three years in a row is worse than that and so on and so forth. Worst of all? When your bitter rival does something so debilitating that you don't even know how to respond.
It's barely spring here in the Midwest but spring football is well under way, and there's abundant intrigue in the Big Ten conference. Coming off what seems like the 46th consecutive disappointing bowl season, including a Rose Bowl where Penn State's 
Hey, it's always football season at FanHouse. Welcome to "
Wednesday is a huge day for countless teenage high school football prodigies. It's the first day they can ink a National Letter of Intent to the college of their choice. For many of these kids, this represents the first big decision they've had to make. 
Okay, that headline is not exactly news. It's up there with "points good to win foot-ball" as far as things you already know. But perhaps the news here is the vast extent to which Ohio State's hopes rest on the (enormous, strapping, terrifying) shoulders of 
In 
And it ain't pretty. Perhaps sensing an opening to take shots at the Notre Dame coach after the new athletic director had to issue something resembling a vote of confidence this week and Jason Whitlock took to calling him 
Every Thursday, 
