FanHouse Zach Randolph

Raw Like Sushi was the name of a Neneh Cherry album. It also could end up being the title for the Hasheem Thabeet rookie highlight video.

Of course, if you think this guy is green now, Memphis coach Lionel Hollins says you should have been around for his first workout after the Grizzlies took the 7-foot-3, 267-pound Connecticut center with the No. 2 pick in last June's draft.

"He was really bad,'' Hollins said. "Even though he's a shot blocker, he only had to stand in the paint in college. Now you've got guys attacking you and how you have to go meet them, he knew none of that. He had no footwork. He had no jump hook. He had nothing. And I can say that out of all the rookies in this draft, he probably has come the farthest. He has the farthest to go, and he still has a long ways to go.''

Home Delivery is your morning roundup of last night's action in the NBA from a fantasy perspective.

The Kings spoil the debut of Allen Iverson by outscoring the Griz 17-6 in overtime, on their way to winning 127-116. Kevin Martin scored 48 points and Spencer Hawes chipped in by almost posting a triple-double off the bench -- 21 points, 11 rebounds, seven assists. The Kings bench outscored the starters 67-60.

Iverson came off the bench to score 11 points on 5-of-9 shooting with just one assist. Underwhelming, but it was just one game. I refused to draft Iverson this year and probably won't get excited about him as we move forward, so keep that in mind.

Three Grizzlies posted double-doubles -- Rudy Gay (21 points, 13 rebounds), Marc Gasol (16 points, 16 rebounds), and Zach Randolph (30 points, 16 rebounds).

FanHouse previews all 30 NBA teams in advance of the 2009-10 season.

The Grizzlies are not a joke. They are the punchline. That's where they've fallen to. They aren't even the setup for the joke. They're just mentioned as the end point.

A little under two years ago, Grizzlies GM Chris Wallace (and by that, we mean owner Michael Heisley) traded Pau Gasol for cap room and some loose junk. The only valuable component they got out of the deal was Marc Gasol. The move elicited everything from mockery to outrage from pundits and even league personnel. Things have not improved considerably since.

Josh Childress started for an NBA team. Von Wafer played significant minutes on an NBA playoff team. Linas Kleiza once scored 41 points in an NBA regular season game (this ain't no summer league, man!) And they're all members of Olympiakos B.C.

Now since Childress decided to taste the awesome flavor of Dolmades, there has been no great exodus. However, that's now three NBA-quality players that aren't even the huge stars on OBC. Which begs a question. We know the NBA elite boast teams that could defeat them pretty handily, but how would Olympiakos do against the low of the NBA?

We all know about the NBA's salary cap -- a limit teams are allowed to spend on players. The cap is soft, and the vast majority of teams exceed the salary cap on an annual basis. Rarely will a team spend a whole season, let alone multiple seasons, under the cap.

But there's also something called a minimum team salary, the level of player spending teams must exceed each year. The collective bargaining agreement signed in 2005 sets the minimum team salary at 75% of the salary cap level. For the upcoming 2009-10 season, that minimum salary would be $43.2 million.

Would you believe that the masters of the cheap, the Memphis Grizzlies, have found a way around the minimum salary? And would you believe it explains the Zach Randolph trade?

Of all teams in need of a good scouting staff, the Grizzlies, who have had 10 top-six picks in 14 years of existence, are at the top of the list. The team had five amateur scouts last season (I'm not calling the scouts amateurs, they scouted amateur players). Next season, Geoff Calkins of the Memphis Commercial-Appeal reports, the team will have zero scouts. Zero.

It's an unbelievable concession, even in this economy. (Insert sad trombone sound.) The Bobcats declining to assemble a summer league squad -- that's unnerving. A team like the Grizzlies decided to detonate the entire scouting staff with the playoffs nowhere in sight? That's abominable.

Of course, given that a real estate mogul, team owner Michael Heisley, makes all the basketball decisions, maybe it's just as well.

If I told you that an NBA franchise elected to take on one of the most infamous locker room cancers in the NBA today, a player that brought failure and police blotter in his wake, you'd likely guffaw and ask who could possibly be running the operation. If I were to then inform you that they were in heavy talks to add a player that some consider essentially blacklisted and is renowned as one of the most combustible personalities in the league, on top of the prior acquisition, you'd probably be stunned at the ineptitude.

If I then informed you that that same team, according to ESPN, had decided to rescind a qualifying offer for a player who had been not only productive off the bench, but could play multiple positions for the depth-challenged team, who was a popular teammate among a young locker room, who always brought a good work ethic, and who they could have released a month earlier into free agency waters, you'd have to wonder if this team was possibly run by deranged clowns, potentially hailing from outer space.

But if I then told you that the team was the Memphis Grizzlies, you'd just nod your head and say, "Of course."

OK, sure. They traded their franchise player a year and a half ago for Kwame Brown and some Skittles. And yes, with the No. 2 pick they managed to select the only basketball player available who's biggest weakness is his ability to put the little ball in the big circle with the net attached (which I hear is kind of important). But hey, they needed to rebuild, and they rebuilt. But they have tons of cap space now, so much in fact, that they're actually under the CBA limit and have to spend some.

So they've stopped torturing their fans with one terrible decision after another right? Right? Guys? Anybody?

Oh, hi Zach Randolph. What are you ... doing ... here ...?

Oh, no.

Ronald Tillery of the Memphis Commercial-Appeal emptied his notebook on the paper's Grizzlies blog. The most incredible (if not uncredible) rumor had Clippers owner Donald Sterling nixing a trade which would have sent troubled/troubling Zach Randolph to Memphis for Darko Milicic and Greg Buckner. Darko instead went to the Knicks for Quentin Richardson and cash. Z-Bo remains directly in Blake Griffin's path and peripheral vision.

I have absolutely no clue why Sterling would nix a deal like this. The Clippers had nearly a full season to realize Randolph isn't worth it. He scores frequently but inefficiently, which is spyspeak for "he takes way too many shots." He's a great rebounder ... but so are Marcus Camby, Chris Kaman and Griffin. Randolph will make more than $33 million over the next two seasons, while Darko (a far better defender than Z-Bo) has a $7.5-million contract which expires after 2009-10 and Buckner's contract can be bought out for about $2 million.

FanHouse fixes a decade of draft-day blunders in Revisiting the NBA Draft.

After two putrid drafts, the NBA returned to form in 2001 -- but not right away. This draft will forever be known as the day Michael Jordan transformed from the greatest player on Earth to a below average general manager. With the No. 1 overall pick, Jordan held the fate of the Washington Wizards in the same hands that dunked on many of opponent, and he had a rich variety of players for which to don the savior of the franchise.

And he chose Kwame Brown. It really wasn't Kwame's fault. He was the victim of an amazing workout that impressed Jordan so much -- was this thing on video? -- that Air was convinced Brown would emerge as an All-Star. The brutal truth is that this prep player from Georgia faded into one of the biggest busts in draft history, hanging out in the same club as LaRue Martin, Joe Barry Carroll and Michael Olowokandi.