FanHouse Augusta

Quick, who won the Masters Sunday? Come on, first name, too.

This might be a first, when the winner of the Masters goes down as the answer to the trivia question. But this is going to be remembered as the Masters that Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson didn't win, assuming long term memories don't twist one of them into the green jacket someday. Also, some older guy (Kenny Perry) didn't win, either.

AUGUSTA, Ga. -- Back in black, with a stylish blue stripe on each sleeve, Tiger Woods snarled and seethed like an unleashed animal as he walked to the first tee. His stare was so intense, he didn't notice the "patrons" who were pushing and shoving in an eight-deep scrum to catch a brief glimpse, pressing so zealously against the ropes that a security guard shouted, "Two steps back, please!"

Of course, this is what the world has awaited for 10 anxious months, the comeback from his Battle of Wounded Knee, the return of sport's most breathtaking and history-rattling show to a major stage. He can't repair the economy, cure diseases or stop Lindsay Lohan from fighting with her ex-girlfriend, but it's uncanny how Woods' presence stimulates the American attention span.

"Welcome back, Tiger," a boy yelled above the din. "Win for me."

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AUGUSTA, Ga. -- And to think it was supposed to be a post-honeymoon lark, a chance for Greg Norman and his bride, a tennis player of some sort, to have fun and experience a British Open. Little did they know their side trip would take a crazy turn toward a haunted place and time. When he shocked the golf world and played well last summer at Royal Birkdale, flirting with a Claret Jug until the end, Norman had no idea a third-place finish qualified him for ... the Masters?

The comedian Will Durst is one of the two bloggers at the official Masters.org blog. He is assuming the role of the "non-golf focused, regular guy" point of view of the tournament.

I think that this can be a valid and an interesting way of covering a golf tournament, but the choice of Durst by the extraordinarily traditional and staid Masters members is very surprising to me. Durst is known as a national political satirist who tends to bash both sides of the political aisle, and at least in the above YouTube clip of his one man show, completely skewers the sitting President of the United States. Some folks don't care for that sort of talk.

Already in his Masters blog he has called the tournament "The Big Kahuna of the Dimpled Ball" and referred to Augusta as "Chlorophyll city" for how green everything is.

I can't fathom anyone thinking that his Masters blog is particularly funny, but more importantly, that the Masters members would think its tone is appropriate.

The Masters is steeped in tradition. But the tournament is on the cutting
edge of technology. The tournament will actually provide exclusive coverage
of the tournament online, starting with the first round on Thursday.
Each day, Masters Extra will provide one hour of play-by-play coverage,
exclusively at www.masters.org, prior to the cable and network broadcast.



So take that coffee break at 3 p.m. on Thursday and Friday. Or, if you're in
the Central, Mountain or Pacific time zones, eat your lunch and watch the
coverage online.

The exclusive coverage will begin at 2:30 p.m. (EST) on Saturday and at 1:30
p.m. on Sunday.

In addition, Amen Corner Live returns for a second year. That too can be
accessed at masters.org. Billy Mayfair and Ian Poulter, who tee off at 8
a.m. on Thursday, should arrive at Amen Corner around 10:30 a.m.

"Providing this additional coverage further demonstrates the importance we
place on the Internet," said Billy Payne, Chairman of Augusta National Golf
Club and the Masters Tournament. "The Internet complements our broadcast and
it fulfills one of our principal objectives of exposing as many people as
possible to this great sport of golf. On-line coverage of the Masters has
great potential to reach an even larger audience."

Augusta National chairman Billy Payne announced Wednesday that golf icon Arnold Palmer will launch the ceremonial first tee shot Thursday as the honorary starter.

Palmer had resisted the honor in years past but relented this year and will revive a long-time tradition.

"I'm happy to be here," Palmer said. "I just wish it were in a different role. I'd much rather be playing."

Asked about the timing of this decision, Palmer said, "Well, I think the time has come."

"My competitive golf is done."

Sean Jensen is an award-winning writer for the St. Paul Pioneer Press. He will be covering the Masters all week for AOL Sports.

My wife, Erica, isn't too thrilled with me right now.

Just got off the phone with her, and she asked me about the weather. "Partly
cloudy and 72," I told her.

"That's nice," she said. "It's snowing and we're going to get three to five
inches. The drive home is going to be terrible."

The last time I left home, Minnesota was sacked with snowstorm. My timing
has been impeccable.

On another note, after wading my way through a sea of people, I wrapped up
my shopping duties and posted $500 in damage.

Clearly a rookie mistake.

I thought I was being smart when I asked someone what color golf shirt they
wanted. But here, there are literally hundreds of short-sleeve shirts,
ranging from $55 to $129. The low-end ones apparently disintegrate after a
week, while the high-end ones are presumably blinged out and stitched with
gold thread.

If you can think of it, that eye-catching gold silhouette logo with the red
flag is emblazoned on it.

I even pulled one of the workers aside and asked him when the discounts
kicked in. He looked at me like I was asking him for an organ.

"This stuff never goes on sale," he said. "All of this stuff will be gone by
the end of the week."