FanHouse Esmailyn Gonzalez

Let us never, ever forget that the players aren't the only ones cheating in baseball. Seems some of their bosses are scumbags, too. With each passing month, it becomes more laughable that this sport has been romanticized as father-and-son, apple-pie, fun-at-the-ballpark Americana.

In the Bud Selig era, please realize that baseball has been as corrupt as any business in the land, so dirty that cans of Glade deodorizer should be distributed at the gates with pocket schedules and Bobblehead dolls.

Some important news and notes from the warped minds at The Dugout:

1. Our annual Spring Training event (hilariously named "Spring Dugz" by Nick), where we cover a different team every day for 30 days, begins on Monday. So if you like ... I don't know, the Astros, be sure you don't miss out.
2. From here on out I won't be "B" anymore, but B. Thompson Stroud. Check the byline. Same letter, same guy, same esoteric jokes about wrestling.
3. Above the words here is an old picture of Dmitri Young being run over by a clownish car, because I felt that image best expresses the 2009 Washington Nationals season.

Now that that's all out of the way, enjoy tonight's Dugout, part 2 of Nationals Lampoon, after the jump.

Jim Bowden could be in a lot of trouble. That's the first thing that comes to mind, anyway, when it becomes public knowledge that the federal government is investigating his scouting/signing practices.

SI.com's Melissa Segura broke the story Sunday evening, alleging that Bowden has skimmed signing bonuses given to Latin America prospects since his days with the Reds. Bowden has now denied his involvement in any wrongdoing.

It had to happen eventually. Jim Bowden, the beloved general manager of the dynastic Washington Nationals, has made a rare misstep. While scouting their way to the top, the Nats awarded the biggest international signing bonus in team history to a can't-miss prospect without looking into how old he is or finding out his actual name. That puts them right ahead of the Astros when it comes to developing a farm system!

Tonight's late night Dugout is after the jump. Unless I'm lying about that, too.