FanHouse Lawnmauer

...for Joe Mauer of the Minnesota Twins for simultaneously being the Magic Johnson and the Larry Bird of professional baseball. He puts up insane numbers (especially for a catcher, which is a talking point I'm sure you need more information about), he plays fair even when he doesn't have to, and he reminds us that the Average White Guy still has something to contribute to popular sports.

The Dugout is also thankful for those of you who are still figuring out that we moved to Back Porch. A big shout out to all of our returning fans, including David from the Hanger Orthopedic Group! What's up, Dave! This morning's Dugout is after the jump.

When asked to name the Major League Baseball player who most resembles Allen Iverson, Detroit Tiger and fellow Lynchburg, Va. alumni Brandon Inge wouldn't be at the top of the list. But here we are in September and those forearm tattoos he got back in August still haven't worn off. If the Tiger manage to make the playoffs, he should compete in a retro headband and a big arm-sized glove that makes him look like Sally Jupiter.

As the race for the AL Central heads into the home stretch, it is important to analyze these tattoos and see how they match up with the rest of the division. Tonight's Dugout is after the jump.

Brett Favre, seen here speaking with his agent, can no longer be rightly described as a polarizing figure in the baseball world. Nearly everyone is weary of his habitual false retirements and underwhelming comebacks. Yet again, though, Favre finds himself unable to walk away from baseball. Today, he announced that he will come out of retirement to play for Minnesota.

Whether the Twins will benefit from his comeback remains to be seen. Today's Dugout is after the jump.

Here is everything you need to know about Minnesota: they have the biggest mall on Earth, it is negative thirty-eight degrees in the middle of July, nobody would ever want to go there, and their baseball team is next up for the AL Central leg of our The Dugout Spring Training Event.

We started it off yesterday with the Detroit Tigers, so give that a read if you haven't yet. And check back tomorrow when we cover the Royals and the White Sox, and it's all really biased because I am an Indians fan, and the closest I will come to "winning" is insulting people anonymously on the Internet.

Today's Dugout is after the jump.

Upon reading the strip The Dugout: Might Happen After All, FanHouse reader Disco Dan Ford commented:
He's right. With the exception of Delmon Young showing up to whip a bat or Justin Morneau showing up to participate in an abstruse Watchmen parody, we haven't featured the Twins in the Dugout. So, now that the season is completely finished, here is a Dugout about the Twins! Hooray!

Tonight's Dugout is after the jump.