FanHouse Maurice Jones Drew

If I know Bengals fans, they are hyped that their team is 1-8. Okay that doesn't sound like much but when that "1" came today, forgive Cincinnati for celebrating. They should celebrate as the pressure of a winless season finally goes away.

Chad Johnson is. He broke out of a season long funk with two TD grabs and a kiss on the cheek for both head coach Marvin Lewis and quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick. Cincinnati got their first win with a gutsy 21-19 victory over Jacksonville.

Here's a screwed up stat for you: the Bengals are 8-1 when they wear the orange jerseys they sported today.

It wasn't their duds that won the game. Cincinnati was aggressive on both sides of the ball and finally played somewhat physical. They even had a guy (Andrew Whitworth) ejected from the game for exchanging punches with the Jags' John Henderson (Henderson was given the boot, too).

Still, Jacksonville nearly stole this one away.

With attention spans dwindling, we forego full game-by-game previews to give you the essentials you need to know about every contest this glorious NFL weekend. Click here to go back in time

The 1's

Kansas City at Atlanta: It's a game featuring a team with a rookie quarterback taking on a team with no quarterback. Falcons signal-caller Matt Ryan had a dreadful week two, missing on his first nine passes, while the Chiefs are still playing musical chairs with Damon Huard and Tyler Thigpen. Larry Johnson isn't impressed by any of it.

Oakland at Buffalo: The Buffalo Bills haven't started a season 3-0 since 1992, and that's exactly what they'll do if they can defeat an Oakland team that has spent this week worrying about who its coach will be, as opposed to the task at hand in Buffalo. If the Bills get that 3-0 start, there's a strong chance Raiders' head coach Lane Kiffin will be searching for a new job on Monday morning. Seeing as how they're likely without Justin Fargas, Darren McFadden is fighting some turf toe and Javon Walker can't make it through practice, there's a good chance that happens.

Every week, NFL FanHouse hits the lowlights from Sunday's action, looking at those players who did the most to move their head coaches that much closer to returning to the Bed and Breakfast business.

James Butler, Giants
You know, I was a little hard on Manning the Younger last night. I accused him of playing great football for 30 minutes, and then turning into an interception-throwing pumpkin, while the Patriots did what they do: mount a second-half comeback and win in handsome Tom Brady fashion.

But after some soul-searching, I've come to the realization that the Patriots-Giants game didn't turn on Manning's fourth-quarter pick, but on what transpired three plays prior. You can see the birds-eye view here, but all you need to know is this: safety James Butler must've blacked out because when the cameras finally caught up with him, he was about 15 yards behind Randy Moss. Moss was making his way to the end zone after hauling in a 65-yard bomb from Brady.

That was the game-changer. To that point, the Giants' offense was moving the ball without much trouble, and the defense was like Plexiglas Burress: bend but don't break.

On the bright side, Manning played probably his best game as a professional, and the timing couldn't be better.
Sorry, No Photos

think it's a little early to say Shawne Merriman's "back to his dominant self," but he did have a nice little outing on Sunday. Of course, every team that faces the Ravens' offense can usually say that after the game. Whatever, Merriman, the Chargers' first-round pick in 2004, looked a lot like the guy who registered 17 sacks last year.

[On Sunday,] Merriman finished with a team-high seven tackles as the Chargers dominated the punchless Ravens, holding Baltimore to 210 yards in a 32-14 victory that once again put San Diego alone atop the AFC West.

Merriman spent much of last week living down this, and perhaps that was the motivation he needed to snap out of his funk:

"My friends are the worst," he said. "My teammates are the worst. They think the TV played it out; my teammates gave me hell about that. We all laughed because it doesn't happen often. They've got to get me when they can. I heard it all week."

Maybe the Chargers can work out a system where MJD jacks up Merriman before every game. Kind of like the routine Jags' John Henderson and the trainer have worked out.

The Jaguars beat the Texans by sticking to their formula: Run the ball, conservative mistake-free quarterbacking, and play aggressive defense to make the other team one dimensional.

The Texans did the Jags a few favors along the way, failing to keep their composure on the road, being incapable of scoring in the red zone and making key mistakes. The score early on in the game could have easily been 17-0 Texans.

The Texans couldn't convert 3rd and goal early in the game after marching it down the field. They marched easily down the field again the next possession and Andre' Davis appeared to score another touchdown. Replays showed that he fumbled it out of the endzone for a touchback.

One of the key plays of the game was a Jack Del Rio Has Stones call. Before the half, with the game close, Del Rio called for a surprise onside kick. It caught the Texans off-guard and the kicker recovered it. This kept the Texans defense on the field longer on a hot day, kept the Texans offense from having the ball with much time left, and allowed the Jags to get a field goal to go into half time leading 10-6.

Hey, look, more idiocy from the league office! I'm all for cleaning up the NFL. And by "cleaning up" I mean "doing away with the Bengals franchise, because 95 percent of all felonies are committed by Cincinnati players." Okay, slight exaggeration, but here's my point: if Commissar Goodell is all about eradicating the ne'er do-wells, that's splendid, but easy, man, you're doing to OD on the power trip.

Two weeks ago, Goodell fined Ravens backup wide receiver Devard Darling $7,500 for following Yamon Figurs into the crowd after a touchdown. Meanwhile, guys throwing players on their head, or grabbing facemasks were only out $5,000. Makes sense.

Now, after Maurice Jones-Drew mistook an NFL goal post for an ATM machine, he's likely to be a little lighter in the wallet.

Every week, NFL FanHouse hits the lowlights from Sunday's action, looking at those players who did the most to move their head coaches that much closer to returning to the Bed and Breakfast business.

Larry Johnson, Chiefs
I understand that Johnson didn't give up large chunks of yards to Maurice Jones-Drew, or shank a short first-quarter field goal, but he gets the Coach Killer honor this week by virtue of owning possibly the worst stat line in recent history: 9 carries for 12 yards, 5 receptions for 3 yards. And it's not like Johnson is some scout team scrub forced into duty because of injuries; he rushed for almost 1,800 yards last year, and stormed out of the locker room last week, presumably because he felt he was underutilized.

Well, when you bust out 1.3 yards per carry, and throw in 0.6 yards per catch, I think there's a reason the head coach might look to other players for an offensive spark. Through five games, LJ is on pace for 296 carries, 880 yards, and zero touchdowns. Curse of 370, meet your next victim.