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Matt Stafford Has a Theme Song

His career line is fairly pedestrian so far, but when your team's getting championship talk and you play in the SEC, your fans inevitably end up doing oddball things.

The motif: Shaft. As seen at DawgSports - can you dig it?
Who's the white quarterback
Who's a pass machine for the Red and Black?
Staff!
You're damn right!

Who's the man who can beat the Gators
Then hoist a keg at Talladega?
Staff!
Can you dig it?

Who's the cat who won't hand off
When he can put Michael Moore in the running for the Biletnikoff?
Staff!
Right on!

They say this cat Staff is a bad quarter---
Shut your mouth!
I'm talking 'bout Staff.
Then we can dig it!

He's a complicated man to all the haters,
But no one understands him but his coordinator.
Matthew Stafford!

Lastings Milledge Would Like To Rock Your Body

Athletes and music go hand-in-hand, sometimes abstractly and sometimes far more literally. The latest literal example? Lastings Milledge, baby:
Milledge already understands the game is the vehicle to get him where he wants to go. The sooner he finds work in the Mets' outfield -- that is, the sooner he gets to New York City -- the sooner he can begin his move toward his other destination, a career in music. That's when he'll really produce.

Actually, he already has. Milledge is a record producer, not a wannabe, an "is." At age 21 -- Milledge turns 22 next month -- he is the president of Soulja BoI Records, Inc. Hip hop, R&B and gospel for the masses, he hopes. He has the material -- he has written two songs and produced 13 others -- the capital, the equipment, the inclination, the motivation and, after taking a course in music engineering, some expertise.

"I'm getting there. I don't have everything yet," he says. "But I'm working on it. I just don't sit around all day, I actually get stuff accomplished."

Not to rip Milledge before the guy gets out of the gate - after all, his stuff could be hot - but any time you hear "athlete wants to make music," it's going to get ugly, and it's all Shaq's fault. Then again, performance and production are entirely two different things, and Milledge is already recruiting some peeps:

Milledge is already looking for more talent. He's courting Jose Reyes, who he thinks could become a reggaeton artist.
Jose, stick to your guns here. You're never going to top DJ if you go all Derrick Harriot on us.

Anyway, good luck to Lastings. We're still recovering from the post-Shaq morass; it's up to you to restore our faith in the conjunction of athletes and music. Godspeed.

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