FanHouse Teixmeix

Mark Teixeira's debut for the New York Yankees was an 0-for-4 affair that was blamed on the unusually harsh Baltimore Orioles fans that felt betrayed by the guy who spent 8 years saying he wanted to play in Baltimore, then went to play directly AGAINST Baltimore for like 200 dollars more a year.

We're a month and a half into the season now, but Teixeira is still playing every game like Prop Joe is in his ear, yelling about how he is greedy and low, in the Dickensian sense. When will he snap out of it? No, I'm asking you. He's on my fantasy team and I'm in 20th place in an 18-team league.

Tonight's Dugout is after the jump.

Hi, everybody! I've been sleeping all day and just woke up moments ago. What's been happening in the world of sports? Heh, did the Orioles bolster their bullpen? Let me jump over and find out what's going o-

Oh. OH.

And here I was prepared to do another strip about the Pirates. Tonight's Dugout is after the jump. Move along, nothing to see here.

Dugout screen name, "StobeTopStuffing."

It's safe for us to break the news; according to our sources, slugger Mark Teixeira has agreed to a deal with the New York Yankees. The deal is for eight years and pays Teixeira a number to which I am not yet old enough to count. Apparently it was Teix's wife Leigh who gave the final go-ahead on the signing. I guess we know who wears the stirrup pants in this family!

Tonight's Dugout (which takes place in an unnamed December of 2008 chatroom, in case you were wondering) is after the jump.

Nothing says "the holidays" like a feature on a blog on the Internet the day after Christmas! I missed out on posting yesterday because of "life stuff" (I had to observe a holiday) but hey, better late than never, right?

Part three of our Life on Mars epic continues. Your prerequisites are as follows:

Watchmaker, Part One
Watchmaker, Part Two
Watchmaker, Part Three (click below)