FanHouse Urban Meyer

Over the weekend, the Florida Gator brain trust decided one way to respond to the 24 football player arrests in the past four years was to send the football team on ride alongs with the local Gainesville police. The theory, apparently, is that if players can see what police do on a daily basis from the front seat of a police cruiser they'll be more likely to stay out of the back seat.

Of course, it also makes it more likely that the police will know the name of the player they happen to be arresting. So everybody wins.

Over the weekend Florida cornerback Janoris Jenkins became the 24th Gator football player to be arrested in the past four years. Jenkins was tased after fighting with men he claims were attempting to steal his jewelry. That happens to all of us when we go out. You should have seen this dude step to me over my pinky ring the other night.

Much of the nation, among them the Florida fan base, collectively shrugged their shoulders. Unless, that is, you happened to be a rival of Florida's who has lost to them on the field in the past few years. Then you were outraged. That's how it goes with college football arrests; we're all a bunch of hypocrites. If our team wins we don't care if the entire team gets sent up the river together, as long as they're back by Saturday. Any amount of off-field incidents can be brushed aside, so long as you're successful enough on the field.

It's been an eventful offseason for SEC football. The addition of Lane Kiffin to the coaching ranks gave the conference another huge name. Instead of taking his lumps at Tennessee after the disastrous end to the Phil Fulmer era, Kiffin came out swinging.

Not only did he and his staff work to sign a top-ten recruiting class, but Kiffin also managed to alienate virtually everyone outside of the Volunteers fan base.

The SEC coaches meetings rolled into Destin, Fla., this week, and Lane Kiffin washed ashore.

You know Kiffin, the man who brought a Molotov cocktail to the SEC tea party, the guy who coaches like tickets have to be sold for the latest WWE event. You halfway expect for him to enter press conferences wearing orange tights, grab the mike, scream invectives at his rivals, then spike the microphone, kiss his biceps, and leave without taking questions. Kiffin coaches college football like Vince McMahon helms the WWE, it's all about creating a buzz.

So this is how it's going to be for Charlie Weis from now on. Urban Meyer here, Urban Meyer there. The dark cloud that is Meyer has been hovering over Weis since he first started failing as Notre Dame's coach. Now, with Weis on his last chance, Meyer keeps looming even more than ever as a reminder.

Steve Spurrier was probably just trying to do his usual, sticking him thumb in someone's eye, in this case his former employer. Meyer has taken over his spot not only as Florida's coach, but also as the nation's top name. So Spurrier, now the South Carolina coach, was on the radio the other day, when he just so happened to bring up Florida and Meyer.

Every Monday during college football's endless offseason, The FanHouse Walk will put last week's stories to bed and deliver the essentials to bridge that agonizing space between now and September.

Mr. BCS Goes To Washington -- Except I have a feeling Jimmy Stewart would find some way to rail against the BCS, however wrongheadedly. You see, the big word in the halls of Congress on Friday was "fair" but don't let that confuse you. While the Mountain West and certain members of Congress are using the fairness term to stoke public support, their real concern is about money.

It's remarkable to think that three years removed from the sex boat scandal, and the subsequent fallout that cost Mike Tice his job, the Vikings would seriously consider drafting Percy Harvin, the former Florida standout who tested positive for marijuana at the NFL Combine in February.

But it's not the failed drug test that should be most worrisome for Minnesota's front office -- plenty of professional athletes smoke weed -- it's the fact that he wasn't smart enough to pass on grass when he knew he'd have to pee in a cup once he got to Indianapolis. As NFL scouts have preached: it's not so much a drug test as an intelligence test. And Harvin flunked both.

Every Monday during college football's endless offseason, The FanHouse Walk will put last week's stories to bed and deliver the essentials to bridge that agonizing space between now and September.

Zed's Dead, But Not The Spread -- Great find from Smart Football of UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel discussing in great detail the spread offense and UCLA's decision not to run it. Smart Football has his response as well, synthesizing Neuheisel's main arguments and where he gets confused before making the conclusion that the term has "quickly lost all use as a meaningful and descriptive term".

The FanHouse Podcast: Because bloggers are much sexier on the phone.

We recently welcomed renowned lawyer turned author/blogger/athlete Clay Travis (read his new book!) to FanHouse. Naturally, we fired up the podcast machine. The result? Ye olde epic two-parter. The first half is after the jump and in it we answer the pressing questions: Is Tim Tebow a virgin? Is "fat-ass" an inappropriate term to use in intramural sports? Should you let your wife time your 40-yard dash? Is working at Deadspin fun? How many crazy pills did Lane Kiffin swallow? And, of course, who's more evil: Urban Meyer or Nick Saban? Do enjoy.

It's not fair, dang it. It's not fair that college football has the longest offseason of any major sport.

I'd probably feel a lot differently if, you know, something actually happened during this interminable stretch. Nothing ever does, however. The coaches are more or less all hired within a day or two of the title game. National Signing Day has proved this year that women are right when they say men don't understand what "commitment" means. And seriously, all you recruits out there, that stupid hat trick is played out. Pulling the ol' baseball cap switcheroo doesn't tell us you're impish and edgy. It tells us you're a sheep without any original thoughts.

What does it mean when we're only nine weeks removed from the crystal football and college football's most buzzed-up personality is Lane Kiffin (above), who hasn't even coached his team to a first down yet?